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Tough luck for those of you
who were eagerly anticipating Eric's return to sexy leather-clad Viking form.
Tonight's True Blood gave us a respite from the tiring
Eric/Sookie puppy love talk, as we learned that Marnie's role in Antonia's war
is bigger than we'd ever thought. Before we dig in, you might notice
that I am not supernatural sexpert Mandi Bierly— last we heard, she
was kayaking her way to the Hoboken branch of Moon Goddess Emporium in the wake
of Hurricane Irene. I hope you'll enjoy this emergency guest recap, even though
I just so happen to be Team Alcide. Try to think of it as an Antonia/Marnie
type of thing.
So it turns out all of
those fancy corporate sponsorships and bottles of AB negative Nan scored
for the Festival of Tolerance were for naught. The whole 'human guards with
spilling entrails' gag sent the crowd into a panic, with humans, vampires, and
witches alike caught in the bloody crossfire. Sookie ran through the crowd to
stop a Mantonia-controlled Eric from snapping Bill's neck while Nan kicked ass,
took a few names, and staked a bewitched vampire with a pencil.
Nan and Bill discussed the
damage when they were safely back at the king's lair, and while Nan was
mostly concerned with the PR disaster she had on her hands, Bill decided that
enough was enough and it was time to kill Mantonia, whatever it may take. Bill
has lost so much since he decided to live life under Nan's politically correct
thumb, (the look on his face when Sookie returned Eric's memories at
the Festival said it all) and now it was finally time to act in his
own best interest again. It's too bad he couldn't have been in the room with
Sookie and Eric when she told him she couldn't bear a world without Bill in it,
and probably only loved Eric because of the intoxicating effects of his vampire
blood. Eric still loved Sookie after Mantonia's spell had worn off, but Sookie
was confused after last week's vivid vampire threesome dream. While it was
interesting to see Sookie admit her feelings for both vampires to
Eric, their first scene together post-memory gain was a confusing
disappointment. The Eric we all fell in love with during the first three
seasons of this show was a cocky, merciless Viking with a fondness for leather
attire and witty comebacks, but this seemingly restored Eric more closely
resembled the lovesick teenager we've been witnessing as of late. That
Eric was great comedy fodder for a few episodes, but I want my Viking back and
clearly Pam does too, judging from the disdainful look she threw Sookie when
vampire and maker were finally re-united. Pam is the voice of reason on
the show.
Sookie, Eric, Pam, Bill, and
Nan gathered in Bill's fabulously re-done foyer to discuss their next move,
which was to blow up Moon Goddess Emporium and all of its
unlucky inhabitants. This included Tara, and Sookie instantly began
to re-think her feelings for both of her vampire beaus when they agreed to
accept the collateral damage and light it up anyway.
While King
Bill plotted their forthcoming demise, the good wiccans at the hurricane
Irene refugee center Moon Goddess Emporium plotted their escape
in Mantonia's absence. The always beleagured Tara seemed to
be ready to throw in the towel, but Holly hit just the right sweet spot
when she convinced her to channel her inner pissed off powerful female to hit
the spellbooks and fight. "We are strong, angry women,
Tara," she said. That is definitely the way to convince Tara Thorton to
fight. Good job, Holly!
Just then,
Antonia/Marnie showed up with her entourage of Wiccans and enchanted vampires
alike. Mantonia was clearly disturbed by the Festival's events, and she
started doing this creepy Gollum thing where the two separate but connected
beings inside of her started arguing with each other for control. Until now it
had always seemed that Antonia was 100 percent in charge, so the whole
spectacle served as tonight's biggest eye-opener. Marnie might not be the
harmless, passive old witch we thought we were dealing with.
When Tara
and Holly snuck away from the group to debate the necessity of the Latin
language in modern spellcasting, they decided to beat Mantonia at her own game
by reversing her hand-burning, Moon Goddess Emporium protection spell. Mantonia
did some sneaking off of her own— she left her entranced subjects behind
when Antonia forcibly removed herself from Marnie to throw in the towel after
the Festival's brutality. Antonia, as it turns out, was a healer who only took
up necromancy to save her fellow villagers from fever. The whole vampire thing
was just an unfortunate by-product! Marnie then became as specist and
pig-headed as Fiona Shaw's Harry Potter character Petunia Dursley, and
re-convinced Antonia that all of the vampires, no matter how sexy they may be,
must die. Marnie was in control the whole time, she just needed Antonia's
power to set the whole thing in motion.
Back at
Jason's shaggin' wagon, the simpler Stackhouse and his new bedmate Jessica
discussed the reprecussions of their actions. Jason regretfully ruminated on
the important role his life-long friend Hoyt has played in his life, while
Jessica angrily defended their actions. Jason said what everyone else is
thinking when he acknowledged vampire blood's role in his seduction, but I
still felt bad for Jessica when he suggested that she glamour him into
forgetting the whole thing. After getting thrown out of Hoyt's and Jason's
homes respectively, this post-coital slight broke the camel's back.
"F--king humans," she said. "I'm going to go find somebody to
eat."
While
Jessica hunted for blood, Hoyt decided to visit Jason the morning
after for the sort of frank discussion best friends have in the days following
a painful breakup. Over a morning beer, Hoyt told Jason about the emptiness
he had been feeling in Jessica's absence and the torturous smells she
left behind, and Jason managed to avoid any eye contact when Hoyt literally
started to cry and asked Jason for a place to crash. Jason, out of
sorts and full of guilt, headed to Sookie's place to eat her bacon and bitch
about Hoyt's drunken flatulence, but the impending Tara dilemma managed to
distract both Stackhouse siblings from their out of control undead love lives.
Finally!
Back at the
King's lair, Bill, Eric, Nan, Jessica, and Pam were chained up to protect
themselves from Mantonia's spell, arguing over their next course of action.
Nan, always focusing on the publicity fallout, threatened the
true death to everyone while Bill stuck to his arson plan and Jessica just
wanted to kill people. So blow up the Moon Goddess Emporium it is! If Eric
and/or Bill still wants to end up with Sookie, they are not
doing a very good job of it. If the last three years haven't taught them that
Tara is a major Achilles' heel, then nothing will.
Sook
and Jason decided to bring their arsonist vampire problems to
Lafayette and Jesus, but Jesus was still convinced that the Spanish spirit of
Antonia was the only culprit, and the innocent Marnie could still be
reached and saved. When they gathered outside of the forcefield-protected
Emporium, Sookie heard an angry Tara inside and Jesus decided to go in to
change Marnie's mind. Lafayette was understandably not happy about the whole
thing (as he shouldn't be— who else thinks that Lafayette is the most normal
inhabitant of Bon Temps and deserves his own spin-off?), but he still let Jesus
go in, probably for the sake of his cousin.
Mantonia
came out to face Jesus on the street as he struggled with the seemingly
electric force-field, and spoke to him first as Antonia. To pass Antonia's test
and win her trust, he would have to tackle the force-field and come to her.
This was not an easy task, and it looked like Jesus might burn until he
transformed into an insanely creepy demon straight out of Insidious or a
Mexican wrestling match. "It's a Latin thing," Lafayette explained as
Sookie and Jason freaked out from a distance.
Latin or not
it worked, and Mantonia led Jesus back into the Emporium as a trusted member of
her circle. Antonia temporarily peaced out so that Jesus could plead openly to
Marnie, but things went sour very quickly when Marnie brought the crazy and
started rambling about her sacred union with Antonia. Jesus tried to
telepathically communicate this to Sookie as Tara and Holly cast their spell,
disabled the protection spell and hightailed it out of there, but when the gang
all gathered outside, Mantonia made everyone vanish back into the store
but Jason.
Then night
fell, and Eric finally got his wardrobe back as he, Bill, Pam and Jessica did
an amazing slow-motion walk towards the Emporium with their flame guns in tow,
ready to kill Sookie once and for all. It's happening next week, guys!
The
werewolfs and shifters of Louisiana were still playing Switzerland in
the escalating witch war, but they definitely managed to drum up
plenty of drama on their own. Tommy was back in his own skin after
taking Sam's intended ass-kicking by Marcus and his thugs, but he was
also spitting up crazy amounts of blood and experiencing bone-cracking seizures
in Alcide's truck. Alcide took Tommy to Merlotte's as his dying
wish, where Tommy was able to pass peacefully with his brother by his side and
a Budweiser sign over his head. I don't think I'm the only viewer who never
took to the terrible Tommy Mickens, but watching Alcide and Sam awkwardly try
to convince him of the heaven that may await him was almost worth the dog
fights and the creepy skinwalking sex scenes. "There ain't no Heaven, and
Hell's a dog fight," Tommy said. Poor Tommy only wanted to be
forgotten, for this one final good deed to erase his sins, even the playing
field, and give him a bit of peace on his deathbed. Sam and Alcide weren't
as comfortable with his existential view of death, and gave Tommy his
final reassuring blessings. "Won't you be surprised when angels come
and lift you up," Sam said. Seriously, this whole scene just reaffirmed
how insane Sookie is for sticking with the vamps when she has Sam Merlotte and
Alcide Herveaux waiting in the sidelines.
When Tommy
finally passed, Sam told Alcide that his new pack leader, Marcus, is a
dead man. Alcide would probably agree if ever learned that Marcus and Debbie
spent their day smoking pot and talking about having illegitimate babies
together, but that's a story for next week. They headed to Marcus and
Friends' body shop for retribution, but Marcus was busy romancing Debbie so
they had to settle on beating up one of Tommy's other random werewolf
attackers. This probably won't sit will with Alcide's new pack, and the
upcoming Sam/Alcide vs. Marcus battle is sure to be a good one, but I had a
hard time focusing on anything but the height difference between Sam Trammell
and Joe Manganiello.
In the
absence of the possessed baby plotline, the Bellefleur family had their own
little story-within-a-story type of week that solely dealt with Andy's cripping
addiction to V. In this week's True Life: I'm Addicted to V, Terry brought Andy out
to the treehouse in the woods they played in as boys, and Andy started to
ramble on about Terry being the good looking athlete in the family when
they were in high school. As Terry dug their old rifles out of the dirt, Andy
explained that V had made him a better man. "That's junkie talk,
Andy!" Terry said.
In the end,
the trip down memory lane convinced Andy that it was time to get sober again,
and Terry left Andy in the woods for a sobering walk home. Somebody please fire
Candy Finnigan, because this was the smoothest episode of Intervention I
have ever seen. Chris Bauer and Todd Lowe are great actors and they're
frequently valuable to this show, but I hope that this embarrassing
plotline is quickly resolved by the time season five rolls around. With all of
the vampires holding flame guns and wiccans transforming into Latin American
demons, the drug problem is an unwelcome distraction.
What did you
this episode? Did you miss the nudity, or did you like the non-stop
action? Will Tommy be missed? Will Sookie, Tara, Lafayette, and Jesus die in a
fiery blaze? It could happen, right?
SOURCE: EW
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