LOVE DOES NOT...

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Love does not dominate; it cultivates.

- Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

THE BEST & MOST BEAUTIFUL THINGS...

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The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even

touched. They must be felt with the heart.

-Helen Keller

LOVE HAS NO DESIRE...

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Love has no desire but to fulfill itself. But if you love and must

needs have desires, let these be your desires; 

To melt and be like a

running brook that sings its melody to the night. 

To know the pain of

too much tenderness. 

To be wounded by your own understanding of love;

And to bleed willingly and joyfully.

- Kahlil Gibran, The Prophet

LIFE HAS TAUGHT US THAT LOVE...

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Life has taught us that love does not consist in gazing at each other

but in looking outward in the same direction.

- Antoine de Saint-Exupery

AGE DOES NOT PROTECT YOU FROM LOVE...

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Age does not protect you from love. But love, to some 


extent, protects you from age.

- Anais Nin

YOUNG LOVE...

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Young love is a flame; very pretty, often very hot and fierce, 


but

still only light and flickering. The love of the older and disciplined

heart is as coals, deep-burning, unquenchable.

- Henry Ward Beecher 

BEING DEEPLY LOVED...

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Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone

deeply gives you courage.

- Lao Tzu

LOVE IS COMPOSED...

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Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.

- Aristotle

¿LOVE STILL?

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They weren't not in love. It's just that the subject, as such, never really came up. It kind of loomed over them like a blissfully stupid cloud. The love cloud.

Guaranteed to rain on your brain, 'til you're moanin' with seratonin.

Maybe what was happening was that they were in love with the idea of being in love. But that's still love, right? Instead of loving each other, they loved an idea. An aspiration. A wish. The other person was more or less of an afterthought. Somewhat expendable, or at the very least, interchangeable.

I love that you make me feel like I'm in love. You, on the other hand, I can take or leave.

Of course, it was just a matter of time before the truth of each other, the hard fact of their unique selfness, their one-of-a-kind snow-flakiness, became unavoidable.

I may be a broken toy, but you are a Chinese crib factory that uses lead paint.

Saying goodbye in these circumstances is always very awkward.

"I just had your car towed."

"That's okay, those Flip videos I

said I erased are now on the internet."

Chuck  Lorre

¿WHY DO PEOPLE FALL OUT OF LOVE?

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Love…Most of us remember, or are at this very moment, feeling the raptures of love, but what about the other side? Many of us who've experienced the joys of love have also experienced the unfortunate fact that love doesn’t always last. Even if you were raised on a rich diet of fairy tales, you know that "'til death do us part” and "forever" can actually be pretty rare things. Even staying with someone forever is no guarantee of experiencing lasting love. The ending of love leaves us sad, depressed, angry, and confused; swearing that we'll never fall in love again. And wondering many things, such as why do people really fall out of love? Is there anything we can do to make love stay? Do some of us give up too easily? What do you think makes a person fall out of love?

LOVE IS A FEELING...

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LOVE is a feeling of goodness, which is like the river, living, moving everlastingly. In that state you will find there comes a moment when there is no longer any search at all; and this ending of search is the beginning of something totally different. 

The search for LOVE, for truth, for feeling of being completely good -- not the cultivation of goodness, of humility, but the seeking out of something beyond the inventions and tricks of the mind, which means having a feeling for that something, living in it, being it -- that is true LOVE. 

But you can do that only when you leave the pool you have dug for yourself and go out into the river of life. Then life has an astonishing way of taking care of you, because then there is no taking care on your part. Life carries you where it will because you are a part of itself; then there is no problem of security, of what people say or don't say, and that is the beauty of LOVE.

SELF SOUL MATE

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Walking around in a supermarket of 2011 pushing a shopping cart, not being able to make up your mind for what you want is like most people ‘in life’. Worse yet, is not recognizing the highest quality of food even if you knew. Most look for outer quality and packaging. Nothing could be more misleading concerning ‘healthy quality’. If you don’t know what you’re looking for and who you are, is synonymous with going to a supermarket, rolling the empty cart through the aisles disoriented.

Life gives back what you look for in yourself in all aspects. If you live in positive consistency, life reflects that back.  On the other hand, in relationships, those who look for love from another, rarely get what their instincts want to find. Two people’ not knowing who they are beneath their outer veneer, are entering a ‘dark, hopeless tunnel of love’ that feels good until they lose each other in the darkness of not knowing either themselves or the other.

Today there are ‘mega supermarkets’ where if two people going in together don’t have a connection, they will find themselves lost from each other. So it is in this active life, where if you don’t tune in to feeling a consistent love with yourself, it’s impossible to find it in another even if you are eyeball to eyeball. In 2012 take time to softly look into a stranger’s eye and you will likely see a shallow, mood changing, self critical person incapable of opening their heart with no expectation in return.

Going into a supermarket, it’s easy to find 100’s of attractive things, particularly on an empty stomach. The ‘non-discerning’ have many opportunities, but usually of low quality, resulting ‘soon to be’ unhappiness and dissatisfaction. People find a partner that reflects where they are inside themselves, and if by chance you find someone who you don’t measure up to in communication, compassion and general awareness, unless you are growing and communicative of that, it’s back to the ‘lost dark tunnel’ where love finds itself lost. The light at the end of that dark tunnel is likely another train wreck coming. Become totally aware of who you are consistently, and then only accept that same, hopefully, high level of quality in all aspects of love and life. Keep a balance; focus on loving yourself, and being aware of how you’re ‘showing up’ in 2012. 

¿HAVE YOU EVER BEEN AFRAID OF THE "L" WORD?

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When it comes to LOVE, our minds can come up with millions of reasons why we shouldn't express it to that special someone; which is EXACTLY why we should. A lot of us have the misconception that we might be able to imply to that person that is seeking to hear it from us. Maybe on some other level of consciousness that can work, but here on earth when it comes to the "L" word we need to speak it into being. The fear of the "L" word can cause one to miss out on SO much...Have you ever been afraid of the "L" word? Have you ever been on the  receiving end of hearing those from someone you loved?

ROMANCING FEAR...

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Whether one chases away, or runs from the ‘fears of love and intimacy’, it’s bad for love and romance. Chasing after love while not finding the love of self is like shooting for the moon without the proper vehicle to get one there and back, coupled with the personal preparation necessary to stay alive. Having a desire to have the ‘romance’ of movies and novels while being only prepared to ‘hoe’ it through life on intellect and unresolved inner stuff, is like running in place in a marathon.

LOVE IS...

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Love is judgmental,
Love is not lending a hand to a stranger in need

Love is painful,
Love is not knowing the sacrifices are worth it

Love is biased,
Love is not recognizing someone's pain and being there for comfort

Love is difficult,
Love is opening your heart to those who want to give

Love is selfish,
Love is putting another's heart second to your own

Love is blind,
Love is not looking in the mirror and know you are someone special

Love is complex,
Love is an insincere smile

Love is  distant,
Love is a heartless hug

Love is the one true gift we have to share with anyone,

anywhere, in an unlimited supply. How's your 'love supply'?

BY ArhataOsho.com

¡THE SACRED VOW OF LOVE

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When we make THE promise of LOVE to another, a subtle yet powerful shift takes place in our souls where intentions are housed; and though speech is THE vehicle used for such a vow, the sacred vow spoken is MORE than just words. The vow of LOVE is a tool we employ in order to facilitate transformation within ourselves and an expression of will. Fulfilling this SACRED vow, whether it is as complex as "'till death do us part" or as simple as "I promise", it challenges us like NOTHING on this planet! 

Why is that the case, why does the SACRED VOW OF LOVE behave in such a ‘teeter totter’ that goes up and down sometimes with a resounding thud? I think this happens because with LOVE, the vow that has been made has to go hand in hand with the balance of the relationship. For as mere human beings we can be balanced with ‘equal and different issues’ that can cause perpetual ups and downs in our lives so IMAGINE when someone else has to be considered? However this can be overcome if two people have a DEEP love of self AND desire to be with each other for as long as they choose. Hence before we get to the VOW OF LOVE, we NEED to prepare ourselves for it! 

I find that the preparation is unprepared preparation for what comes (confusing huh?). Moreover, one rarely has clear insight into the mind of another to see how the other is feeling the love.  Two people may start in the same place internally with love but, as time travels on to another day, they usually lose sight of the moments that initially bonded them together. 

But all in all LOVE is a blessing and an asset! Too often the word is used as a trap, exercised on the negative side to manipulate, dominate and control. Love, is like a credit card that gets abused with hollow promises of ‘making it up later’. Then ‘love amnesia’ takes over as the ‘hollow I love you’s pile up along with demonstrations of forgetfulness to keep total focus on the assets. Isn’t it funny how ALL that is ill in humans can be corrected by GENUINE LOVE? Isn’t it even sadder that we trivialize the SACRED VOW LOVE in the form of sex? Until we learn that THE highest form of love is compassion, we will NEVER find ourselves nestled in the comfort of LOVE’S embrace…

So as we embark on the journey of LOVE, we need to understand that once this SACRED VOW is spoken, it becomes a part of your existence FOREVER! Your view of the world around you may change, and your predominant thoughts and feelings will no doubt evolve with time, but the spirit in which your oaths were spoken will remain unaffected. It is up to you to determine how you will stay true to your vows while your inner AND outer worlds are transformed. Your strength and character will inevitably be tested as circumstances make keeping promises increasingly challenging, but after you have shown yourself steadfast many times, your appreciation of the sanctity of LOVE’S VOW will be cemented in your mind and soul. 

LOVE FROM AFAR...

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All relationships hit bumps from time to time, and THE hallmark of maintaining any relationship means one has to find THE ability to ride out the turbulence and somehow…someway remain intact. We LOVE others through ALL of their transitions, yet more time than not, that sentiment isn’t extended to us. So I’ve learned over the years that one has to find a way to embrace and appreciate the differences that set us apart from each other while NOT actually being apart of each other’s lives on a daily. This way we all can allow each other to be EXACTLY who we are and NO one has to end up feeling hurt OR taken advantage of.

Loving others from afar means NO stress from family, work OR other people that you deal with on a daily. MANY of us are VERY sensitive and put on a STRONG front, NEVER breathing a word about how others make you feel…but how long that last? How long before you break? Sweeping yourself under the rug makes for a bumpy rug that NEVER gets straightened out; and putting others before you while you wear a mask, NO matter how noble the mask, leads one to identify with and think they are the mask! Which will ultimately lead to your breaking point…So you MUST find a way to RISE IN REAL LOVE and know that just might mean that you HAVE to love others from afar…

Short changing yourself to make sure others are okay is NOT what life is supposed to be about! So why spend life continuously dealing with folks that are SET in their ways AND situations that WON’T change? The time to OWN our emotions AND who we are, is NOW! We need to live a life that is as peaceful as we can get it. So moving past the apprehension that we allow to keep us trapped needs is the FIRST step, which would undoubtedly lead to a feeling of liberation and enlightenment. This is because the act of making a clear connection between your circumstances and your feelings unravels the mystery that previously kept you from being in complete control of your emotional state. To give a voice to your feelings necessitates that you let them go. In the process, you naturally relax and rediscover your emotional equilibrium.

HOW TO MAKE LOVE...

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INGREDIENTS:
4 Laughing eyes
4 Well-shaped legs
4 Loving arms
2 Firm milk containers
4 Nuts
1 Fur-lined mixing bowl
2 Firm bananas

DIRECTIONS:
1. Look into laughing eyes.
2. Spread well-shaped legs with loving arms.
3. Squeeze and massage milk containers very gently.
4. Gently add firm banana to mixing bowl, working in and out until well
creamed. For best results continue to knead milk containers.
5. As heat rises, plunge banana deep into mixing bowl and cover with
nuts, leave to soak (preferably NOT overnight).
6. The cake is done when banana is soft. If banana does not soften,
repeat steps 3-5 or change mixing bowls.

NOTES:
1. If you are in an unfamiliar kitchen, wash utensils carefully before
and after use!
2. Do not lick mixing bowl after use.
3. If cake rises, call the bible and report another miracle!

LOVE IS NOT A FIGHT

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I HAD A VISIT FROM A FRIEND OF MINE THIS PAST SATURDAY & WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT LINGERED WITH ME UNTIL I WENT TO BED THAT NIGHT…SO I HOPE THE WORDS & LYRICS HEALS HER & THOSE THAT ARE CONSTANTLY HOLDING ANOTHER’S HEART WHEN THEY DON’T HOLD YOURS…

Love is not a place
To come and go as we please
It’s a house we enter in
And then commit to never leave

Lock the door behind you
Throw away the key
We’ll work it out together
Let it bring us to our knees

Love is a shelter in the raging storm
Love is peace in the middle of a war
If we try to leave, may God send His angels to guard the door
No, love is not a fight but it’s something worth fighting for

To some, love is a word
That they can fall into
But when they’re falling out
Keeping that word is hard to do

Love will come to save us
If we’ll only call
He will ask nothing of us
But demand we give our all

I will fight for you
Would you fight for me?
It’s worth fighting for

JUST LET LOVE...

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Lord knows this is not the sort of thing I brag about. But I have a ridiculously happy relationship with Noel. REALLY, it's almost disgusting. We goof around like kids (well mostly me). We basically act like giddy newlyweds. Sometimes we'll do something so revolting, like say I LOVE YOU, that we're forced to make gagging noises to maintain our dignity. Cute huh? But as cute as that can be, there seems to be SO few of us out there that are looking for a stable relationship. Moreover there seems to be this thinking that we are the ones that are doing something wrong…I find it interesting how there is this free-fall in the community AND EVERY man is fair game…I get that as kids we were taught to share and share alike but that doesn’t give us the RIGHT to go after another’s relationship. Most of us live as if we are here to DISHONOR the bonds of relationships @ the expense of the community. Let’s be honest here. In many cases, most GAY men KNOW that NOTHING can come from them interjecting themselves as a third party in a relationship. However by them acting in such a manner FURTHER makes things difficult for us. I wonder what we need for us STOP the bleeding? What do we need so that OUR community can STOP falling further AND further behind? I don’t know WHO, WHAT or WHEN things will change, but LET ME MAKE IT PLAIN: I do NOT apologize for being in a COMMITTED and LOVING relationship. And if I may CLEAR THE AIR, many of us GAY men are tired of trying to deal with boys trapped in adult male bodies that try SO hard to bring drama of this sort. I am TIRED of having to put up with the silence from these men that have a lack of intestinal fortitude in policing their hormones. Funny we are VERY vocal when it comes to blame, but NOT to admission. There is a lot of SELF DECEPTION among the males in the community; and there seems to be this expectation that there should be some sort of pardon because they can’t help themselves. Is it fair to those who are making their relationships work? Does it make sense? I SAY NO! They focus their attention on THEIR needs and continue in their own selfish ways. What truly amazes me is how many of us allow these boys to disrupt our lives. I figure if we are willing to be used as a hydrant and act like a dog, then we shouldn’t be amazed if you find fleas in your midst…ISN’T IT HIGH TIME THAT WE DEVELOP A PURPOSE THAT BETTER REFLECTS HOW WE’RE EACH THE MASTERS OF SHAPING & FORMING OUR COMMUNITY? WHEN IT COMES TO CREATING LIVES OF PURPOSE & FULFILLMENT NOTHING WILL REPLACE THE INDIVIDUAL ACCESSING THE WISDOM OF SELF PRESERVATION THAT SUSTAINS OUR COMMUNITY LIKE THE UNIONS OF TWO GAY MEN…SO WHEN ARE WE GONNA BE LED BY OUR HEART N’ SOUL INTSTEAD OF HORMONES N’ EMOTIONS & JUST LET LOVE…

¿IS IT LOVE OR A SCRIPT?

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…So he makes you feel good when you are with him, does things that are NOT in line with a relationship and you ONLY see him when it is fitting for him…YET SOMEWHERE IN ALL OF THIS YOU’VE CONVINCED YOURSELF THAT HE MUST LOVE YOU. Isn’t it funny how life works? We live life deluded because SO many of us CANNOT differentiate when IT IS LOVE or A SCRIPT…TALK ABOUT BEING TERMINALLY SINGLE FOR THE REST OF ONE’S LIFE…I am of the notion that the way we choose to love is as unique as the way we choose to make a living, maintain our health OR entertain ourselves. It is all about making the right choices. Therefore when we are choosing to ACCEPT LOVE into our lives, there needs to be NO exceptions. After all This isn’t a play OR movie role, this is REAL life and this type of drama should be left for the soap operas. And we live as if we do NOT have COMPLETE creative control over it. Within us lies the power to examine what works OR isn’t working in our lives and make EDITS to our lives. Choosing to actively live your life as a script where you are the ONLY actor is INCREDIBLY lifeless. And carrying around the thoughts of LOVE that does NOT exist can ONLY lead to heartache AND pain. I understand that feeling of emptiness, BUT that loss can become a gain…This space can be filled with the hope AND the joy of something REAL, something we can in turn call OUR own. Isn’t it NICE to know that there are MANY ways to weave the threads of LOVE into a blessing? So why do we allow ourselves to mistreated, used AND abused in this foolish manner? If seeking the good in what is a BAD situation makes you feel comfortable, then remember you are devaluing what is RIGHTFULLY yours in the first place…SO STOP SURRENDERING & LIVING LIKE HAVING LOVE ON THE GO IS OUR PURPOSE; & IT IS TIME THAT WE ACKNOWLEDGE THE PHANTOM OF LOVE THAT WE LIVE WITH. ISN’T IT ABOUT TIME WE STOP THINKING N’ BELIEVING THAT BECAUSE HE HAD SEX WITH US THAT HE MUST BE IN LOVE. ISN’T TIME THAT WE STOP ACCUSING LOVE OF DOING US WRONG WHEN WE ARE THE ONES THAT DOING IT ALL ALONG? ISN’T IT TIME THAT WE ELECT THE TRUTH INTO OUR LIVES & NOT PLAY THE LOVE OR SCRIPT GAME FOR THE REST OF OUR LIVES?

LOVE...

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Why are GAY men so complicated? Why are most of us SO afraid to give, AND receive LOVE? Why is the greatest form of expression so hard to achieve? I have ALWAYS believed that concept of LOVE itself is not hard, or complicated, it is us who turn this simple emotion into a big complication. One of the most difficult challenges in life is learning not to take things to heart and hold on to it. Especially when it comes to LOVE…For all of my adult life, I have encountered SO many men that say that they want LOVE in their lives, but their real motive is all but a physical one. Once they have reached climax they move on the next sucker with hope AND faith that LOVE is still alive…BIG MISTAKE! I am of the opinion that EVERY TIME we engage in relationships that are NOT rooted in LOVE we are destroying the elements of LOVE. I have outlined 3 scenarios about the GAY man that I feel are the most detrimental to LOVE and how WE go about it in OUR daily lives.

SCENARIO ONE: THE POSSESSIVE CONTROLLING GAY MAN - I believe that many GAY men are possessive and controlling and that they are either in denial or will justify their actions. Nonetheless, a GAY man who is possessive is someone who feels that you belong to him. The STRANGE thing for is that there are a lot of us who will treat a guy who you have just known for a short period of time like he's your property, believing that even in dating, each of you would not be checking out other guys, flirting with other guys, or talking to any other guys. Since you consider him yours for the time being, he cannot give his number or take a number from another dude until you both are no longer interested in each other. If you catch him talking to someone else, he is considered to be cheating on you, even though you are not in a relationship. Now the handwriting is on the wall as to what kind of relationship this would look like, and you enter into a relationship anyway. There was this guy that asked me if his man was controlling and I told him to ask him and he did. @ first he tried to deny it by saying that he knows how the game is played and how relationships don’t last for us, so he takes it upon himself to takes control for the benefit of them…BULLSHIT! WTF ARE WE DOING TO OURSELVES? BE IT THE CONFIDENT, RESOURCEFUL & KNOWLEDGEABLE ABOUT LIFE TO KNOW WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU MAN; OR THE MAN THAT THINKS THAT YOU CAN’T FOCUS ON EACH OTHER IF YOU ARE ALLOWING OTHER MEN TO APPROACH YOU WHILE YOU ARE SEEING EACH OTHER, THIS MAN IS NOT GOOD FOR YOU OR THE LOVE THAT YOU ARE SEEKING.

SCENARIO TWO: THE “PERFECT” GAY MAN – Height AND weight proportionate, nice dick, 7.5-9”, between 5' 10" and 6' 4", light-skinned with beautiful bedroom eyes, business man with his own luxury car AND apt/house…Other GAY men wish they were him, your friends want to be with you and you feel blessed that you have him…BUT HOW PERFECT IS THIS MAN? Yes he maybe a GOD among men (WHICH ISN’T THAT ARE TO ACHIEVE), but he is real? I ask this because this because my opinion is that more than likely this man that would cheat on you left, right AND center. Moreover, if he is SO great; WHY WOULD WANT SOMEONE LIKE YOU? I don't mean that in a negative way. I'm saying, that you have merely BOXED yourself in a typical way of thinking when it comes to a man, and it seems that it is more about him being certain things than him just begin with you. HOW ABOUT LOOKING INWARD? I feel that most of us put ourselves in a place where this type of man will save AND LOVE us when that is so far from the truth. My thinking is that maybe we have missed out OR possibly over-looked the ONE who is REALLY meant for us. For he may not be the right height, or has the right look, or may be on public transportation; but @ least he may ACTUALLY LOVE YOU! DO YOU THINK THIS MAN IS THE ONE THAT IS GOING TO LOVE YOU OR ARE YOU HOPING THAT HE HAS YOU ON HIS LIST? THE “PERFECT MAN IS ONLY PERFECT BECAUSE HE COMPLETES YOU & NOT MAKES YOU WHO YOU ARE. HOW CAN A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THAT REALLY LAST? MORE IMPORTANTLY DO YOU WANT IT TO LAST? SHOULDN’T LOVE PLAY THE MAJOR ROLE RATHER THAN IT BEING ABOUT HIS PEFECTION?

SCENARIO THREE: THE UNFAITHFUL GAY MAN - Is being faithful something to strive for, however, something that may never be achieved? Sure, many of us want to be in a faithful relationship, but how realistic is that concept? The sad thing for us is that in a GAY relationship one OR both partners will step out on the other. Moreover, we stay despite knowing that the man we are with is giving himself to another. Why is that, why do WE allow this to become OUR fate? It is SO obvious that the TRUST barrier is gone AND there is VERY little that one can do to bring it back. Nevertheless, we pay with OUR souls by staying with a man that cheats and blame it on LOVE. How many of you have been with your current partner for some time AND found out that he has cheated on you? I get that is it HARD to just pick and leave, but I feel that is the best thing to do, even if it is for a short period of time. WE need to give ourselves to process what has taken place AND figure out if he is someone that WE want OR need to be with. The thing about relationship is that sometimes things brew in the head of one person without communicating the REAL issues to their other half. Then before you know it, you AND he becomes you, him AND the other man. Why put oneself through this drama? It's clear that you're yesterday's news AND he is today's jerk. Like Tina said, WHAT’S LOVE GOT TO DO WITH IT? Especially when you're left with a mere shell of your manhood; and who wants that? You don't have to ride this roller coaster with him and his behavior more than likely won’t change no matter how much you cater to him OR try and make it all better. It is time to MINIMIZE the damage AND LOVE yourself. Believe in your own self-worth AND leave him to deal with what he has created. WE ALL DESERVE TRUE LOVE & COMMITMENT, THE CHOICE IS OUR TO MAKE. LOVE DESERVES LOYALITY & WE CANNOT ACCEPT ANYTHING OTHER THAN THIS. I KNOW THAT THE HARD PART IS LEAVING & NOT TURNING BACK; BUT THE JOURNERY BECOMES MUCH EASIER WHEN YOU FALL OUT OF LOVE WITH THE FEAR OF BEING ALONE & START LOVING YOURSELF INSTEAD.

I FEEL THAT IT IS TIME THAT TO CALL FOR SUBMISSIONS & ASK OURSELVES SOME SERIOUS QUESTIONS. IT SEEMS THAT WE DON’T KNOW HOW TO LOVE A GAY MAN OR EVEN OURSELVES. THEREFORE, I WONDER HOW WERE WE TAUGHT TO LOVE? WHAT DO WE TEACH OTHER? HOW DO WE FIX THINGS? MUCH IS MADE ABOUT THE ADVERSE CONDITIONS IN WHICH WE GAY MEN LIVE; WE ARE SUBJECTED TO HOSTILE ENVIRONMENTS, HAVE BEEN SERIALLY DEMONIZED & STRIPPED OF OUR IDENTITIES. THE GAY MALE CONSCIOUSNESS IS FRAUGHT WITH COMPLEXITIES THAT STEM FROM ONGOING MISTREATMENT & SELF-NEGLECT COUPLED WITH DENIAL. YET, WE TRY TO LOVE IN SPITE, & PERHAPS BECAUSE, OF ALL THE CHALLENGES WE FACE. OUR EXPERIENCES SHOULD BE A RICH LAYER UPON WHICH WE BUILD A BETTER LIFE FOR OURSELVES.

SHADOW OF "TRUE" LOVE

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It has ALWAYS been my belief that any act of LOVE is a step in the evolution of life. LOVE does not differentiate between the love you give yourself and the love you give others. Loving yourself is NOT self-centered; it is the KEY element in life…IF ONLY WE ALL KNEW THAT! Just yesterday, I was online having chat with a buddy of mine and he seemed very frustrated AND hurt. After asking a few questions I came to realize that he was in a relationship that serves him NO purpose. Now the thing about it is that he says that his boyfriend is the ONE for him, but he hasn’t heard from him in over a week and he is getting tired so he is going to have sex with someone else because he is lonely. Now I know that I am NOT the brightest man in the world, but logic would stand to reason that if a man is about to cross this bridge then he should not be in the relationship he is in @ this present time. It is MY belief that LOVE does NOT express itself in this regard. If he does what LOVE requires of him he would be in harmony with himself and will NOT feel this need to bring another into the relationship. Of course he tries to explain to me that the LOVES his boyfriend and he him, but sometimes LOVE isn’t enough. I agree with that sentiment; however I am of the opinion that one cannot honor the wisdom of the ages without coming to LOVE. Hence he cannot LOVE this man without loving himself and LOVE cannot be expressed without being LOVE. TRUE LOVE is shown via actions AND NOT words. Hence his NOT being able to be in a relationship that is going NO where is pointless AND fruitless. This lying AND cheating only fosters the image of what GAY men subscribe to AND it is destroying us. We seem to live as if we cannot find a descent man OR live as if nobody wants to be with us when it is us that do NOT want to be with a man that is worthy of us. Therefore, as we maintain this energy of NOT knowing what TRUE LOVE is, we are going to get what is enviable, being alone, through our 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, 60’s, and up. Many of us point to the other guy as our reason for NOT having LOVE when we NEVER had it from the start. I believe that LOVE is what they say it is; LOVE does NOT hurt OR seek to destroy us. It is us that are playing games AND is NOT serious about life. They say that the definition of insanity is doing the same things over and over again, expecting a different result. Doesn’t it sound like insanity, to say LOVE but NOT live OR feel it around you? Most of us know think we know what it feels like to have LOVE; but we don’t. ONE WOULD THINK THAT WE WOULD DO WHAT IT TAKES TO MAKE “THE” CONNECTION & solidify A LIFE THAT IS OF SUBSTANCE. WE HAVE SOOOOO MANY THINGS GOING AGAINST US AS GAY MEN THAT WE DON’T NEED TO MAKE THINGS ANYMORE COMPLICATED. STAYING IN A RELATIONSHIP THAT DOES NOT bask IN THE GLORY OF SUN IS JUST LIKE GROWING OLD WITHOUT SOMEONE IN YOUR LIFE. IT HURTS MY HEART TO KNOW THAT WE CHOOSE TO LIVE THIS WAY…NONETHELESS, I HAVE FAITH THAT WE WILL ONE DAY MAKE THE RIGHT DECISION & TAKE OUR PLACE IN THIS WORLD…MY ONLY FEAR IS THAT I HOPE WE ARE NOT TOO LATE…

14 DAYS OF LUV: DAY 14 - FOREVER (LUV IS)

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I LOVE Valentine's Day. I LOVE the notion of a day committed to all things LOVE. Yes, I know every day ought to be filled with love and it is, but February 14th, well, that is the CAPSTONE FOR ALL THINGS LOVE! I am a hopeless romantic. I own it. I am shameless in my faith in love and happiness. I have seen too much, experienced too much and have decided that love and happiness suits me. I am not some silly empty headed school boy. I am standing in the Grown man Space with my heart on my sleeve. I do not want to be cautious and afraid of love. I do not want to be shy or guarded. I want to be falling down drunk with LOVE. I have known what its like to be without love and I can't go back to that...EVER! NO LONGER DO I BELIEVE THAT THE IDEA OF LOVE IS MEANT TO BE MY VALENTINE, & I WILL END THE DAY AS I BEGAN IT…IN LOVE. His happiness is VERY important to me and HIS LOVE is one that I will hold with me FOREVER. HE IS THE BALANCE OF WHOLNESS THAT FIND WITHIN ME…THE GETTING WITHOUT GIVING. I AM HIS IMPERFECT BEING, LOVE MAKES ME KNOW THAT IF I WERE PERFECT, I WOULD NOT NEED HIM…I WOULD BE PERFECT UNTO MYSELF. LOVE DOES NOT LIVE IN POLARITY, LOVE KNOWS PERFECTION & WE DO NOT. LOVE IS GIVING & NOT LIMITING, IT ENCOURAGES FREEDOM & INDIVIDUALITY WHILE SHARING & GIVING OF ITSELF. I BELIEVE THAT LOVE MIRRORS OUR OUTER & INNER WORLD…OUR MOST INTIMATE REFLECTIONS ARE ON DISPLAY THAT CAN ONLY ENHANCE & MATURE US…AMIDST THE YAWNABLE & LAUGHABLE EVENTS THAT IS MY LIFE, I HAVE FOUND THAT LOVE IS FOREVER…

14 DAYS OF LUV: DAY 13 - LIFE (LUV IS)

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WE WERE BORN WITH LOVE. Yet some of us say AND live as if LOVE is just a four-letter word. We live in a culture that does NOT seem to know that LOVE IS LIFE! Hence as a result, many of us find ourselves laboring under this negative notion. It is VITALLY important that WE remember that almost nothing in this world is all good OR all bad, and most everything is a complex mixture of gifts AND challenges. Hence whatever difficulty one has with LOVE needs to be cleared up for he will have a life that is pretty much dead. So truth be know; I believe that the ability to spend time alone is one that most important thing LOVE can give us. It is because of LOVE that one can feel safe AND secure in himself and NOT worry about LOVE for he knows that LOVE will keep him. For seeing the POSITIVE side of LOVE can lead us deeper into our gifted visions AND fertile imaginations. Though @ times, life seem like it is filled with a DESPAIR that is waiting for LOVE, though it should be the opposite because LOVE is simply waiting for LIFE. However, one needs to remember that when looking @ LOVE, one should focus on what's right instead of obsessing over a short list of what might be better. Too many times we compromise our values AND who we only to find that we did NOT dig beyond the surface of what LOVE is really about. It is a very strong word, and a very powerful feeling when LOVE really finds you, just make sure you are really ready for it. LOVE by all accounts is a mystery in same vain as the LIFE we lead…NO WONDER THEY ARE ATTACHED TO EACH OTHER! No matter what is said about LOVE, NO one can really explain it. Everyone have his/her own opinion…BUT THE ONE UNDENIABLE FACT IS THAT LOVE IS THE ONE DRIVING FORCE IN THIS WORLD & WE ALL WANT TO HAVE A LIFE FULL OF IT…