...JUS' A WHORE INTERRUPTED

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I admit; I had a feeling that my life would be more of the same. And yet, I was looking forward to change, hoping that it would be different. I know I should know better. But I see how I came to feel optimistic. I came across a path in the road that seemed to be a promising one, a path that interrupted my life of FUCKING for the FUCK of it. I guess I wanted to be saved from myself so I took it. What fool this mortal be for I knew that what I was couldn’t be sustained by I wanted to be and I see now that the warning signs were in place before I HE came along. I heard voices calling to me from the shadows of the night, I heard mournful cries in the night to come rescue these souls these lost souls of the night. My help is needed I cannot pretend that i am not aware… it’s my duty! this is reason i was born; this is the reason why cannot be a whore interrupted any longer. Firstly, I must admit that being a whore has it perks; I get fuck and fuck and fuck and did I mention fuck? There are so many MEN out there why should I just limited myself to just one @ a time? I have taken my right place in society and come to realize that it’s my duty to right the injustice; I must help those that need taste of me. All my life I knew that I wanted to share a piece of myself with everyone that I meet and what better way than this? Think about it, these lost souls after all they are the victims and their murderers are walking free. It pains my heart to hear these souls cry out and know that I am their HOPE and SALVATION, I must brave the DARKNESS and set free those that are captive. Funny how I feel like I am home, I am @ a place that was meant for me; a place that in this moment in time I shall live. This DARKNESS beckons me to bring these souls to the LIGHT. The cries are louder and louder shouting out to me TELL US WHY YOU LEFT US? HOW DID I TURN MY BACK ON THEM SO EASILY? HOW COULD I ALLOW LOVE TO MAKE ME FORGET THE ONES THAT NEED LOVE (MY LOVE)? I know that I have ignored them long enough and I like the patron saint MOTHER THERESA MUST HELP THOSE THAT ARE LOST. I feel guilty for leaving, I have been selfish and don’t’ deserve to live. How could I believe that the EXTRA-ORDINARY MAN that I am was meant for just one man? How could I knowingly be the Archangel, the spirit of blood and mire; the signal before death, an omen before the awakening? To world I am a WHORE but to those that I show the light to see me as the reincarnation; a wise soul searching - loving; those that need my light. I find youth during their revelation, and then take on the responsibility, of explaining away the exodus. You can pretend that I am just a WHORE but you know that I am the guardian of the son, but I am there when both Demons and Angels come to earth do battle with man. I am the Sparrow a breath of heaven I bring the desires of MAN to life. This WHORE is the lightning that strikes down the madness and destroys your enemies. My D!CK is the only weapon, I need it is the eye, holding the crystal vision of the future-knowing of what must be done to save man from destroying; the fate of his own SEXUALITY. I change man’s destiny, crushing the selfishness of blinded destruction; working the sphere of time; risking all. This is my destiny, I am the CHOSEN one; so hear my voice; and listen to my word. I know you feel that I am crazy or lost but au contraire I am very much aware of what I am doing…I PAUSED FOR A MOMENT & NOW I AM BACK & I AM NOT IGNORING THE CRY OF NIGHT AND THOSE LONELY SOULS THAT NEED ME…

NOW WOT?

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Walking Alone

Neither sin nor holy deed,

Can unchain me from my need,

To hear your voice,

To feel your touch,

I never would have thought,

I'd miss you this much.

From the moment we parted,

I began wandering the uncharted,

To have truly loved,

And truly lost,

I stole a piece of heaven,

And must now pay the cost.

The world seems so void,

And I am terribly annoyed,

That no matter what I say,

No matter what I do,

No matter what the time,

I still think of you.

The hardest thing is not to call,

To sit and do nothing at all,

To agonize in solitude,

Over my terrible fate,

To walk into the future,

Without my ¿perfect mate? It Would Have To Be With You

If I were to fall in love,

It would have to be with you.

Your eyes,

your smile,

the way you laugh,

and the things you say and do.

Take me to the places,

My heart never knew.

So, if I were to fall in love,

It would have to be with you.

If I were to give my heart,

It would have to be to you,

For you bring things into my life,

So beautiful and new.

Love, so soft and warm beside me,

That I know it’s true,

If I were to give my heart,

It would have to be to you.

I was looking for an answer.

I was looking for a way.

To keep the magic that you bring,

To each and every day.

To live our lives together,

As only lovers do.

It started with a feeling,

And every day it grew,

So, when I knew I was in love,

It had to be with you.

Care

Tell me your dreams,

what you and your subconscious mind share

We will find a doorway at the end of the stairs

Nay don't feel upset

Nay don't stare into space oblivious of the world without a care

Why are you just unaware

About the objectivity of life's true meaning that one should bear

Maybe you're lacking the warmth and care

Maybe you should not compare

Or maybe one should impregnate you with Love,

Solace and CareI don't know about tomorrow

So just forget about your sorrows

That makes you feel so furrowed

As tomorrows are never seen

Until it is shared

Goodbye

God took you away.

It doesn't seem fair,

but in the back of my mind,

you will always be there

You were more than a close friend,

our paths did cross,

and your absence in my world,

is to me a great loss.

You were too young to die,

and too innocent to feel that pain.

Only heaven benefits,

because you it has now gained.

I may think of you a little less

with each passing day,

but your strength is something I won't forget,

you have changed me in a way.

I wish for you eternal peace;

that's what you deserve.

BUT TELL ME...Why do you miss out on so much of life in an attempt to maintain a sense of comfort and security? DO YOU KNOW THAT...The real security comes from being willing and able to gracefully handle all of life's ups and downs as they come your way. AND YET I WONDER...Why do you let your fears stop you from living the rich and full life you were created to experience? I THINK YOU SHOULD...Step back, look at those fears, accept them and then move confidently forward. I WILL BET MY LIFE THAT YOU DON'T KNOW...Why do you sit so long and wonder what is to be done? WHEN YOU HAVE TO KNOW THAT...Your most treasured dreams are ready, right now, to be lived.

TEN THINGS GAY MEN SHOULD THINK ABOUT...

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1. HIV/AIDS, Safe Sex That men who have sex with men are at an increased risk of HIV infection is well known, but the effectiveness of safe sex in reducing the rate of HIV infection is one of the gay community's great success stories. However, the last few years have seen the return of many unsafe sex practices. While effective HIV treatments may be on the horizon, there is no substitute for preventing infection. Safe sex is proven to reduce the risk of receiving or transmitting HIV. All health care professionals should be aware of how to counsel and support maintenance of safe sex practices.

2. Substance Use Gay men use substances at a higher rate than the general population. These include a number of substances ranging from amyl nitrate ("poppers"), to marijuana, Ecstasy, and amphetamines. The long-term effects of many of these substances are unknown; however current wisdom suggests potentially serious consequences as we age.

3. Depression/AnxietyDepression and anxiety appear to affect gay men at a higher rate than in the general population. The likelihood of depression or anxiety may be greater, and the problem may be more severe for those men who remain in the closet or who do not have adequate social supports. Adolescents and young adults may be at particularly high risk of suicide because of these concerns. Culturally sensitive mental health services targeted specifically at gay men may be more effective in the prevention, early detection, and treatment of these conditions.

4. Hepatitis Immunization Men who have sex with men are at an increased risk of sexually transmitted infection with the viruses that cause the serious condition of the liver known as hepatitis. These infections can be potentially fatal, and can lead to very serious long-term issues such as cirrhosis and liver cancer. Fortunately, immunizations are available to prevent two of the three most serious viruses. Universal immunization for Hepatitis A Virus and Hepatitis B Virus is recommended for all men who have sex with men. Safe sex is effective at reducing the risk of viral hepatitis, and is currently the only means of prevention for the very serious Hepatitis C Virus.

5. STDs Sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) occur in sexually active gay men at a high rate. This includes STD infections for which effective treatment is available (syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia, pubic lice, and others), and for which no cure is available (HIV, Hepatitis A, B, or C virus, Human Papilloma Virus, etc.). There is absolutely no doubt that safe sex reduces the risk of sexually transmitted diseases, and prevention of these infections through safe sex is key.

6. Prostate, Testicular, and Colon Cancer Gay men may be at risk for death by prostate, testicular, or colon cancer. Screening for these cancers occurs at different times across the life cycle, and access to screening services may be negatively impacted because of issues and challenges in receiving culturally sensitive care for gay men. All gay men should undergo these screenings routinely as recommended for the general population.

7. Alcohol Although more recent studies have improved our understanding of alcohol use in the gay community, it is still thought that gay men have higher rates of alcohol dependence and abuse than straight men. One drink daily may not adversely affect health, however alcohol-related illnesses can occur with low levels of consumption. Culturally sensitive services targeted to gay men are important in successful prevention and treatment programs.

8. Tobacco Recent studies seem to support the notion that gay men use tobacco at much higher rates than straight men, reaching nearly 50 percent in several studies. Tobacco-related health problems include lung disease and lung cancer, heart disease, high blood pressure, and a whole host of other serious problems. All gay men should be screened for and offered culturally sensitive prevention and cessation programs for tobacco use.

9. Fitness (Diet and Exercise)Problems with body image are more common among gay men than their straight counterparts, and gay men are much more likely to experience an eating disorder such as bulimia or anorexia nervosa. While regular exercise is very good for cardiovascular health and in other areas, too much of a good thing can be harmful. The use of substances such as anabolic steroids and certain supplements can adversely affect health. At the opposite end of the spectrum, overweight and obesity are problems that also affect a large subset of the gay community. This can cause a number of health problems, including diabetes, high blood pressure, and heart disease.

10. Anal Papilloma Of all the sexually transmitted infections gay men are at risk for, human papilloma virus —which cause anal and genital warts — is often thought to be little more than an unsightly inconvenience. However, these infections may play a role in the increased rates of anal cancers in gay men. Some health professionals now recommend routine screening with anal Pap Smears, similar to the test done for women to detect early cancers. Safe sex should be emphasized. Treatments for HPV do exist, but recurrences of the warts are very common, and the rate at which the infection can be spread between partners is very high.

TREASURE OF LIFE

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There are treasures in life,

but owners are few

Of money and power

to buy things brand new.

Yet you can be wealthyand feel regal too,

If you will just look

for the treasures in you.

These treasures in life

are not hard to find

When you look in your heart,

your soul, and your mind.

For when you are willing

to share what's within,

Your fervent search

for riches will end.

The joy and the laughter,

the smile that you bring;

The heart unafraid

to love and to sing;

The hand always willing

to help those in need;

Ones quick to reach out,

to labor and fee.

So thank you for sharing

these great gifts inside;

The caring, the cheering,

the hug when one cried.

Thanks for the energy,

encouragement too,

And thank you for sharing

the treasures in you.

MANY TIMES IN MY LIFE

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Many times in my life I have disappointed you,

and begun to stray.

But you have pointed me in the right direction,

and sent me on my way.

Many times in my life I've needed a helping hand,

and someone to pull me up.

It was you who gave that helping hand,

and always cheered me up.

Many times I've been sad and down,

and taken it out on you.

But you stood by me and comforted me,

In times that I was bad.

Many times I've needed support,

and to know someone was there.

It was you who held me up,

and showed me how to care.

Many times I've wanted to tell you this,

But never got a chance.

You have helped me out in life,

and got me where I am.

You were there for me through thick and thin,

You never gave up on me and you taught me how to care.

From the deepest of my heart I want to say I love you,

And to thank you for being there for me in times of good or bad.