A while back ‘Project Runway’ mentor and new
co-host of “The Revolution,” Tim Gunn, dropped jaws everywhere when he revealed that he hasn’t had sex in 29 years….and he’s totally okay with
it. To me what’s fascinating about this revelation is not the
self induced celibacy; it’s that Gunn admitted exactly how long it’s
been.
We live in a society where sex and lots of it is
everywhere and very much a part of our lives. From porn websites and
politicians, to reality shows and advertisements, sex sells and big time.
So in a world where sex is practically everything, where do you fit in if you
aren’t getting any?
Of course not
everyone is going without sex for 29 years, but I know people who act like
going without it for 2 days is a sign of the apocalypse. Many people lie
about how active, or not, their sex lives really are, no one truly wants to
admit that more often than not it’s just them in the bed at night…if
that. For his part Gunn’s decision to refrain from sex was actually a
reasonable one, Gunn claims the decision followed a difficult breakup and is
partly “psychological.” He cites health, and fear of sexually transmitted
diseases such as AIDS.
According to
Gunn:
“Do I
feel like less of a person for it? No!” he said. “I am a perfectly happy,
fulfilled individual. I am happy to be healthy and alive, quite frankly.”
But let’s face
it, no matter how practical and rational his reason, Gunn is in the minority.
Not too many people are trying to go 6 months without sex, so 29 years??
Yea no. Most of the time if people go long periods without sex it’s not
totally by choice; they probably just haven’t found anyone they find attractive
enough to give it up to. I tip my hat to Gunn because I personally went
two years straight without sex in college and let me tell you, there was
nothing fun about that right there. Nothing.
What’s The
Longest You’ve Gone Without Sex?
Though not by choice, I was celibate for the final 2 years of my marriage and for 6 years after that until I came out and began to actively seek the company of other men.
ReplyDeleteThere is a great piece on this topic in "Joy of Gay Sex", which I happened to read just yesterday - "what most discover when they become celibate is a surprising lack of pressure and stress in their life. They feel relieved, relaxed, and capable of being more objective about themselves and their relationship with others. Without the constant need to be sexually desirable, they begin to recognize abilities and values in themselves that may have been overlooked or underrated: charm, a sense of humor, creativity. Work on these areas (free of sexual pressures) can lead to a fuller sense of yourself ..."
I suppose so, but I never want to go back to the dark and lonely existance I endured while I was finding myself, but maybe I needed to be there in order to become who I am now.
You was married? Got any children?
Deleteyep.. 21 y.o. son
DeleteThe longest? Hmmm... 25 years. My age. =D
ReplyDeleteAre you serious? WOW!
DeleteUnfortunately...
DeleteDon't think it is unfortunate and you shouldn't either, your path is different so EMBRACE it!
DeleteReal talk: Sex is a luxury, not a necessity. Food, water, shelter, clothing, decent health are necessities. Sex is a sweet bonus. So, whenever I'm not in a relationship or seeing someone seriously, I can & have gone w/out. The longest? Almost two years.
ReplyDeleteOne.
You inspire me.
DeleteSince becoming sexually active, about a month or so.
ReplyDeleteWe all have to start somewhere, right?
DeleteBeen there done that. I've gone without for 2-3 years (and was actually okay with that). And sometimes, it's just easier with your own hands (and/or toys). :)
ReplyDeleteSO easy with your own hands @ times.
ReplyDeleteOuch... 29 years? I can't go 29 DAYS! No dick? No ass? That's a tough one... Even before I was in a relationship, I had a lil guy on the side. I turn into a complete asshole when I haven't bust in a few days. Not that that makes it okay; but a nigga has needs...
ReplyDelete-_Cogito
I am trying to remember how long I went without getting any, I know it was NOT 29 years!
Deletebut it prolly FELT like 29 yrs...
DeleteIT SURE DID!
DeleteJuly 4, 2012 will be 2yrs. I could really go for a good lay, but I've been without this long, I could go on for a while longer. :)
ReplyDeleteSo this was deliberate choice to not have sex in 2 yrs?
DeleteHold on - does oral count???
ReplyDeleteHmm, I will consult the judges.
DeleteOral always counts in my book.
DeleteSorry Jesse the jury says it does count
DeleteNever feel sorry for a man getting oral;)
DeleteTELL HIM J!
DeleteHmm, and here I was thinking I was all alone. Seems I have competition, not that I'm going for a record. Currently a couple of months past 26 years. Do I care after all this time? Yes and No! Eventually you reach a point where not doing it is as much a habit as doing it is. Can't say I am living the positive life with positive attitudes like Tim Gunn says he is because if I did, I would be lying. Have to say I miss human touch or more to the point, the feel of a naked man's body. I also miss a nice piece of manhood in my mouth. We all have our trials and tribulations and I guess this is one of many of mine. Peace.
ReplyDeleteWhat kept you away from sex?
Delete