OLDIE, BUT GOODIE: THIS GAY MAN'S LIFE

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OKAY IN READING THISBLOG, I FEEL I HAVE TO POST A DISCLAIMER BECAUSE I KNOW THERE WILL BE SOMEONE THAT FEELS THIS IS NOT ME, I TURNED OUT OKAY & THAT IS WONDERFUL FROM WHEREI SIT. HOWEVER, THERE ARE MANY OF US THAT AN ENTRY LIKE THIS HITS VERY CLOSE TO HOME. I PROMISED MYSELF THAT I WHEN I RE-BLOG ENTRIES THAT I’D EXPLAIN WHO ORWHAT INSPIRED THEM & FOR THE MOST PART I CAN REMEMBER BITS N’ PIECES, BUTTHIS ONE POINTS TO A GUY THAT I QUASI-DATED A FEW YEARS AGO. I RAN INTO @ THEGROCERY STORE A FEW WEEKS AGO & HE WAS GOING ON & ON ABOUT HOW HE ISSINGLE & MISSED MY LIPS & HE WANT WHAT I HAVE WITH NOEL BUT…(YOU GETTHE PICTURE RIGHT?)

This ‘LIFESTYLE’ is full of F&CKING, FUN & FOOLISHNESS; which prompts a question in me, WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU ARE ALL GROWN UP AND THE DISCO BALL DROPS? WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOUR D!CK CAN’T F&CK EVERYTHING IN SIGHT? WHAT HAPPENS TO ALL THE HEARTS YOU PLAYED WITH? WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU BUILD A LIFE BASE ON THE PREMISE THAT YOU WILL BE YOUNG FOREVER AND YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FABULOUS? I will tell you what I think becomes of you, you become a FORTY year old man (HOPEFULLY) and find that no matter how much money you make, no matter how many persons you call your friends you realize they aren’t.

I think the saddest thing is when you’ve come to acknowledge that you are lonely and have no one to be there for you the real ways that count. I know you are tired of just hooking up or kicking it with someone sexually when all you truly wanted was someone to talk to. I know the holidays are vast approaching and wouldn’t it be nice to spend it with a loved one? I’ve met men that just stay home a lot, work a lot and don’t make time to deal with themselves because the loneliness is a B!TCH. Can you imagine having a huge ASS house with no one to come home to? Can you imagine how lonely it feels to have a dining room table that just collects dust because you haven’t used it? These men are great cooks and spend all their time in the kitchen trying to get peeps over just to have some company, not that I think that’s bad; but when the last person leaves then what? 

GOD KNOWS I HAVE PLANS FOR MY LIFE AND THAT EXISTENCE ISN’T WHAT I HAVE IN MIND…I know it’s fun to live like life will always be a certain way, I say put your head in the clouds but make sure your feet are firmly planted on the ground…If you get swept away send out an S. O. S. ASAP…Don’t get caught up in the routine of WORK, HOME, GYM, TELEVISION AND F&CKING IN BETWEEN. When we look at our hetero siblings and friends and see them spending those festive times with their kids and in laws and such, how does that make you feel? We can have those options if only we strive to achieve such things. For me, loneliness is not a big part of my life. Growing up I am accustomed to having people around me; not just anyone ordinary group of persons but persons that were family, persons that cared and loved me. I urge everyone and anyone HOMO or HETERO to try and build relationships that can sustain and enrich your existence on this planet. This thing called loneliness has led some of us to hooking up when that isn’t our hearts desire, to dating and dealing with someone we knew we had no right even associating with, to spending inordinate amounts of time online speaking to a bunch of strangers just to have someone to talk to and for some it leads to depression.

The holidays are approaching folks, and a lot of us are single but unlike myself will spend it with FAMILY, FRIENDS & A FEW SPECIAL PERSONS THAT IF IT’S THE UNIVERSE’S PLAN; I WILL SPENDING A LOT MORE CHRISTMASES, THANKSGIVINGS, EASTER etc. on a LIFETIME BASES WITH. I ask those of you involved to think about your single GAY friends who will be solo and maybe have them over for dinner, or those of you who are single, call up some other single friends and all of you converge at one person's house and everyone cook and enjoy some companionship and so on. Christmas is approaching, how about get 5 or 6 friends together and have a gift exchange? Become each other's company and enjoy the holidays. Please don’t get caught up in the ‘LIFE’, please don’t fall into that ‘TRAP’ strive for a life that will sustain you, a life you can reflect on one day and say, ‘DAMN THAT WAS A GOOD LIFE!’

Life

By Charlotte Brontë

Life, believe, is not a dream

So dark as sages say;

Oft a little morning rain

Foretells a pleasant day.

Sometimes there are clouds of gloom,

But these are transient all;

If the shower will make the roses bloom,

O why lament its fall

Rapidly, merrily,

Life's sunny hours flit by,

Gratefully, cheerily,

Enjoy them as they fly!

What though Death at times steps in

And calls our Best away

What though sorrow seems to win,

O'er hope, a heavy sway

Yet hope again elastic springs,

Unconquered, though she fell;

Still buoyant are her golden wings,

Still strong to bear us well.

Manfully, fearlessly,

The day of trial bear,

For gloriously, victoriously,

Can courage quell despair! when you stand there can you fill him

standing there with you saying do it like I do

can you hear him when you sing

his voice can you hear it

when the guitars and the drums beat so hard

and you close your eyes is he there smiling

is he there walking on stage yelling with you

can you see his bare foot prints

did you hear him say its your turn

does the tears come when you play

one of his songs all alone

do you miss him sometimes so bad you can taste it

is he there to pray with you at night

can you hear him say come on little brother

lets see if we cant catch a big old fish

did you fill him pat you on the back

when you were done and did you hear his whisper

saying he was proud