OLDIE, BUT GOODIE: DOUBLE DIPPING

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THIS BLOG WAS INSPIRED BY THE GAY MEN THAT I CAME IN CONTACT WITH. THESE MEN WOULD HURT EACH OTHER KNOWINGLY & THEN SOMEHOW ACT AS IF THEY HAVE NO IDEA HOW THINGS GOT TO THAT PLACE! I OFTEN FIND HUMAN BEHAVIOR VERY INTERESTING & THE WAY HOMOSEXUAL MEN BEHAVE WITH EACH DOES A VARIETY OF THINGS TO ME. I KNOW MANY WOULD READ THIS & THINK THAT I AM JUDGING AND/OR CRITICIZING BUT I AM NOT, I AM MERELY POINTING OUT A BEHAVIOR THAT WE AS GAY MEN TEND TO SEE AS SOMETHING NORMAL OR/AND ACCEPTABLE WHEN IT IS NOT!

What happens when your committed partner grows bored with your sex life and desires to see other people? He doesn't exactly tell you; and he just somehow sleeps with other people from time to time. I am of the opinion that NOTHING good comes in threes…tires, shoes OR relationships, so when he takes it upon himself to have sex with another person outside of the relationship I say that it is over. Three persons in a relationship can be a good idea if all parties involved agreed to such a thing. However, most of us seem to either forget OR have amnesia when it comes to letting the other person know that they are DOUBLE DIPPING. 

We need to understand that HEALTHY relationships are a complete package; emotionally, spiritually, mentally AND sexually. I cringe when I hear gay men make excuses for the deficiencies in their relationships. How can it be okay to F&CK  someone else because your partner is NOT what you anymore, but he hasn’t done anything wrong so you cannot leave him? Of course, no relationship is perfect and there are always things that couples can work through together, but the first step to solving a relationship issue is recognizing that there is indeed an issue rather than getting it on with someone else. Either way a relationship cannot fix itself if one partner is seeking sexual gratification elsewhere. Things like this make me so upset and I wonder why is it that WE gay men are SO willing to accept a part time relationship, but demand everything else in our lives be complete? How quickly we insist our food to be prepared @ a fast food restaurant, but we willingly accept an incomplete man? Why should we settle for men that want every part of us except monogamy? 

I SAY CLOSE THE VALVE ON THE FLOOD OF HIS DOUBLE DIPPING & FORCE HIM TO THE TABLE & GET TO THE BOTTOM OF HIS NEED TO SEEK OUTSIDE ACTION. LOVE SHOULD NEVER BE CONFUSED WITH HAPPINESS & IT IS INHUMANE TO LOVE THINGS THAT ARE NOT GOOD FOR US. THE CORE OF A PARTNERSHIP SHOULD BE TO DEVELOP THE MOST COMPLETE BOND POSSIBLE. WHY ARE WE ATTEMPTING TO CREATE A TRIANGLE WITH TWO SIDES THAT ARE BROKEN? DOUBLE DIPPING CANNOT FIX WHAT IS WRONG WITH A CURRENT RELATIONSHIP; IT MAY SPICE THINGS UP TEMPORARILY, BUT THE INTENT IS FOR US TO LIVE FOR A WHILE ON THIS PLANET. SO WE NEED TO GET OUR ACT TOGETHER OR WE WILL HAVE A COMMUNITY THAT IS OUT OF CONTROL…WAIT WE ALREADY DO…