...LAY ME TO REST

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It is SO sad to see humans trapped with this EARTHLY REALM, as their SPIRIT remains completely free of the confines faced here. Hence, I have taken an oath within myself that I will NOT live within such a place anymore and I WLL LAY ME TO REST! In life we experience numerous disappointments each and every day. Our expectations go unmet, our plans are blocked by circumstance, our wishes go unfulfilled, and we discover that our lives are subject to a multitude of forces beyond control. Hence, meeting such persons permeates MY BODY and MIND; interfering with MY well-being in profound ways. My NATURAL human tendency of investing ENERGY and making others feel HUMAN beyond what I did with them SEXUALLY causes more problems than it is worth. I feel like I am two sides of the same moon, only I am NOT waxing AND waning in the night sky, but right in front of my eyes. It is as if I am following the same cyclical pattern, lighting the darkness with a luminous glow. However my NEW moons are overshadowed by the DARK moons. When my moon is DARK, I take the time to meditate on emptiness of the being that is forging this pattern within me. During this time I yearn for a FULL moon so that there can be completion AND fulfillment, strengthen my connection to the universe. However, I have come to realize that the LOST SOULS came way in DIVINE order, but it is up to me to decide when I had enough and I can NOT do anything else to assist them. Nonetheless, it is hard because I get that they can only see so much from where they sit in their particular bodies, so in the midst of their lives; I see how they can get confused. However in my quest for a life less ordinary I have to step back and NOT allow myself to get caught up in satisfying my AND their SEXUAL appetite. HENCE I MUST LIVE AS IF HUMANS HAVE INTRINSIC VALUE & I HAVE ACCEPTED THAT THE DEFENSES N’ BARRIES THAT MADE THEM FEEL SAFE CHANGES WHEN THEY MEET ME & THEY NO LONGER WISH TO SHUT OUT INTIMACY or LOVE. I AM NOT THE KIND OF MAN THAT CAN BE CONSCIOUSLY BLOCKED OUT OF SOMEONE’S HEART. BUT I HAVE TO LAY ME TO REST BECAUSE I NEED TO ESTABLISH FRIENSHIPS, NOT ALLOWING MYSELF TO BECOME A FIXATION OF ANOTHER. THUS FULFILLING MY TRUE PURPOSE.