WE ARE MANY, but in solitude I stand, waiting for an answer if anyone can grant. If I can get an answer, to the world I will shout, THIS IS WHAT OUR COMMUNITY SHOULD BE ABOUT!” We breathe and respond. We should share a loving bond; we share the same ground and same heart in all of us pounds. But I can’t help but feel that we I am alone; I came to the realization that WE will never rise because we don’t believe in OURSELVES. I came to the realization the other day that our community we never be where it should because the persons in it don’t believe in themselves. I find it so hard to deal with, I feel as if I am here in an empty room full of people. THEY REAP THE REWARDS & BENEFITS, BUT DON’T WANT ANY OF THE PAIN & SCARS. It’s so crazy that these MEN want to F&CK other MEN but can’t deal with their own SEXUALITY. How can you like being something you HATE? How does that compute or make sense to you? If the life is wrong leave it be, stay away from it…STOP BRINGING THE COMMUNITY DOWN! Tell me…Is this Life? Is this what it’s all about? Should we enjoy life and ignore the thing that pricks like a knife? Is this LIFE all about our NEEDS and not our DEEDS? Why do we find it so hard to walk upon God's Earth and squish its mud between our toes? Why can’t we walk around with HUMAN feet touching the ground? Why can’t we show the rest of the world that we are just as important as they are? This hurts my HEART so much, yet still I hold onto OUR COMMUNITY as it slips away. It’s like I am in plain sight and no one can see me. I am that picture they keep in their pocket that got lost in their dreams when they wake up. I am desperately trying to be remembered racing through empty highways and byways seeking something, anything…anyone that could make me see that there is HOPE that I don’t need to be living on a PRAYER. I only wish that I was a drug that they took because they would use me more. I can get in their SOUL and spread my message of ACCEPTANCE (SELF), LOVE & PEACE. I want to make them see that this is who we are and this life we are meant to live. But alas all get is how this LIFE is an illusion and how it will be over soon. I hope that someday all will be explained to ME when this will happen because I lost that notion, that way of thinking…maybe I lost it in a bottle or it left to find the truth. Every time I get up, every time I breathe I stumble and fall and all I can do is look at the sky and hold on to my DREAM. I want us to own who are, let us make this community what it should be. I want us to release blame, guilt, and shame. We are caught up in a knot of pain. I want us to LOVE ourselves, appreciate, and believe we are the best of who we are. I want us to understand that WE can’t give up and let the world crush and destroy us. We are compassionate people, we need to nourish, support, sustain and protect who we are as a community. I want us to practice listening for the deep truth that resides in our HEARTS, if we don’t we are depleted and off center. Hence if we are depleted and off center, we will be unable to care for ourselves in a healthy manner. As I practicing truly loving myself, I am better able to love and understand you. Can’t you do the same for you, for me…for our community? I BELIEVE DO U? Tell me that you don’t know that seeing is believing and hearing is seeing and feeling is knowing; you know that I am here fighting this fight. I know that when it rains it pours, but know that the sunshine will give me relief. Just look into my eyes see my lust for our freedom, feel the pain I have in my heart. Touch my HEART, caress my MIND, fondle and manipulate my SOUL. Come closer and feel the wetness of my face and my heart that beats for YOU, ignore the raindrops that falls in your space, beneath your waist…at your place. Come share my umbrella, my world, and MY story while these raindrops keep falling…
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