¡We can no longer be a bunch of empty minds living in critical times refusing to recognize real lies!

Wednesday, 25 July 2012


1) Kids/babies have one big job while growing up. They have to figure out how the world works. So they try to understand and make sense out of what they encounter and see. One of the big ways they do that is to swallow the values and beliefs that their families, teachers and society tell them about being an adult. The good kid who downloaded all the programming about who he was supposed to be in life is typical of a man who comes out late in life. Not being a questioning or introspective type of guy, he will either stumble over a guy that he falls in love with, or have a mid-life-like crisis. It will be at this point in his life that he finally figures out that he is unhappy. Suddenly, his life will not be fulfilling, and it is then that he really starts to search inside of himself and starts the process where he hopefully will figure out what is missing.
2) Some men acknowledge that they have had feelings for other boys and men while growing up, may have even had several sexual experiences, but feel that they cannot still be loved and be gay. They may continue to have sex on the side or not, but they feels like imposters as they act and do what is expected of them, even as they die inside.
3) Another possibility is that, as a boy, he was sexually abused. Whether he identified what happened as abuse or not, he uses those feelings as the basis for the belief that he would not be having those feelings towards men if it had not happened to him. This man is deeply ashamed and full of self-loathing. He desperately wants to be normal, and is angry about what was done to him as child and how it is keeping him from feeling/being normal.
4) Any and all of the above maybe tied to a religious belief that homosexuality is wrong. A common part of the self-hatred that makes up the core of how a gay man or boy may see himself is due to buying into the belief system that who one is, or what one does, is bad. While religion can and does play a positive role in many people’s lives, when a religion tells its believers to hate themselves for being who they are, it is criminal, and creates unnecessary pain in the world.


  1. NONE of the above...

    I was always attracted to men, had a few enjoyable early-teen encounters, but went on to do the hetero thing; marry, have kids and live a monagamous suburban middle-class life. I liked women; still do, and thoroughly enjoyed sex with them. Had a number of relationships over the years and knew that something wasn't exactly 'right', but had no burning desire to find out what it was and really carried no guilt about getting off on men. My private thoughts were just that; private.

    When the time was right; divorced for a number of years and with a grown son, I decided to see what M2M sex was all about and discovered that I couldn't get enough of it.

    Again, when the time was right, I met and fell deeply in love with MR RIGHT and can now say that having what I have now, I was never really in love before. I never felt the intense desire, loyalty, bond and as I have recently discovered, the unconditional love for a woman that I feel towards my man.

    I only have one regret, and that is having waited over 50 years to find my true self and my true love, but maybe that is how it had to be.

    1. Maybe you weren't ready for your true self.

  2. Unfortunately, some men never figure it out or, if they do, go into deep denial and translate this into rabid homophobia.

    1. Yeah talk about being trapped in your own life.

  3. Methinks some ppl are infected w/ that vicious Disease To Please (others) & when it comes to pleasing their authentic selves, they fail so miserably.


  4. oh yes...they all were on point. And yes, sometimes that need to be REAL with their self may never come. It gets to the point were its not only denial but DELUSIONAL...the delusional that they really ARE straight. A shame.




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