¡We can no longer be a bunch of empty minds living in critical times refusing to recognize real lies!

Sunday, 31 January 2010


As I religiously explore the inner recesses of my soul through this blog to gain a deeper understanding of religion; it AMAZES me how most of us pride ourselves on our self-sufficiency. We like to be responsible for taking care of ourselves and pulling our own weight in the world. This is why I find how most go on about religion SO confusing!

Most believe that he who has the most is THE most blessed…You hear it all the time…God bless me with this N’ that because of my dedication and so on. Pastor tells his church how he got where he is because of the goodness of God, but I can’t help but wonder if God has blessed him with certain things, why are SO many not as blessed as he is? I mean they all attend the same church, worship the same God yet…How could SO many NOT see that their various LOVE offerings are just their contributions to the PONZI SCHEME in disguise called religion?
Ain’t it funny how they have NO problem allowing themselves to be oppressed in this way? TALK ABOUT THE UN~VERIFIABILITY OF RELIGION…Is it any surprise that religious leaders anoint themselves in this way? How could they not when they have taught their followers from a young age to implicitly believe whatever they say? They believe that their religious leader is of superior virtue, with a hotline to God and his all-perfect morality. But what happens when the day comes for them to cash in?

OH I GET IT…HEAVEN IS THE ULTIMATE GOAL SO ALL MATERIAL THINGS DON’T/WON’T MATTER! So them giving their last dollar to pastor is a sign of humility…right? Most would say that humility is that rare individual who humbly bears life’s struggles while downplaying their own strengths and in stark contrast, pastor lives it up. In my opinion the notion of humility is NOT passivity. Rather, it is an utter lack of self-importance to the point where the individuals who embody the concept of humility appreciate that each human being on the planet occupies a unique place on an infinite spectrum of development. I often hear folks say when you are saved by God, he saves you from your sins and NOT your senses so…

Saturday, 30 January 2010


(Something Inside) So Strong is a song written and recorded by British singer-songwriter, Labi Siffre. It was released as a single in 1987 and was the song that brought him back to mainstream popularity in his home country.

The song was inspired by a TV documentary Siffre viewed in 1985 in which a white soldier was seen shooting at black children. Apalled, he penned the song as an anti-Apartheid anthem, which was a very serious issue at the time, advising Africans to stand tall in the face of adversity.

The song was the biggest success Siffre would ever have in his career, peaking at number four in the UK Singles Chart and bringing him out of self-imposed retirement and back into the public eye. 

A certain blogger has been having such a rough time lately that I wish that I could reach out and physically touch her but I can’t…I can only touch her spiritually. And my way of seeing her through the rough patches of life is to try to instill the words of this song in her. She has SO much going on and rather than taking on her burdens with no solution in sight, she can remember that she is made of STRONG stuff. She can know that as her pendulum swings back N’ forth, I will be there as she can remains still, go inward and find that something inside SO strong.

Friday, 29 January 2010


We all have our own way of being in the world and we all occupy a distinct role in the universe. We grow up in different environments, affected by a unique range of influences. The preferences, values, and beliefs we embrace are often related to our origins. However, in this life we walk a fine line that is based on a life of SOLITUDE or COMPANIONSHIP. Over the course of my time on this planet, I have met MEN that I thought were @ the time a PERFECT match. WE did not end up where I thought we were going to be and I realized that I had a small glimmer of HOPE that it would change, even though I have NO reason to think otherwise. Nonetheless, the thing about LIFE and TIME is that things CHANGE seasons come and go making the NEW OLD. So, I have come to realize that things did not blossom because they were not meant to be. This made me feel a bit SAD and DEPRESS especially when I found out or heard that they actually ended up dating someone else soon after I decided to leave things to themselves. Silently I wished that I were that person in his BED, HEART and LIFE! I wondered often what was wrong with me, what part of me was not showing that I could be what he needed all along? How could a man NOT see another genuine soul in front of him? I guess I had too many expectations for myself and what I seeking in men…Well NO matter that was then and this is now! I KNOW THAT WHEN I MEET THE MAN THAT I AM MEANT TO BE WITH I WILL RECOGNIZE HIS ENERGY & HE WILL KNOW MINE. For far too long I have been selling myself short, placing him on a pedestal. I based my RELATIONSHIP needs on what I thought I saw and not actually, what was there. NOW I HAVE COME TO A PLACE IN MY LIFE WHERE I HAVE PROCESSED & RELEASED A FEW ISSUES & THIS IS ONE OF THEM. I HAVE ACCEPTED THE BARRIERS THAT KEPT HIM & ME FROM BECOMING WE, NO LONGER DO I TELL MYSELF THAT I AM WHAT HE SHOULD WANT or NEED. EITHER HE KNOWS IT OR…WHEN I AM HIT WITH THE THOUGHTS OF LOVE THAT I WANT TO GIVE & NO ONE TO GIVE IT TO, I WILL REMEMBER THAT I AM IN THIS PLACE, IN THIS TIME FOR A REASON. I HAVE ACCEPTED THE PLEASANT REALITY THAT WAS WITH ME FOR A LONG TIME & NOW I AM HONESTLY, COMPLETELY & GLEEFULLY SO OVER IT!

Thursday, 28 January 2010


Sooner OR later I know that someone is going to question me about my sexuality because I am NOT your typical anything. I've been told in the past by folks that they can tell something is up with me, but they can't put their finger on what it is...I keep telling you guys that we GAY men and women are THE MOST popular persons on the planet! No matter how many times homosexual issues come up, folks still pretend like it is a shock to meet persons that are gay. So given the notion that straight folks are CONSTANTLY trying to get into our bedrooms, I been wondering, what clever response you give to persons that you DON'T want to know about your sexuality...You know that response that keeps your business private, but doesn't give anything away? YEP THAT! I normally would ask if the persons asking if they are interested OR know of someone who is so...¿HOW DO YOU RESPOND TO THE SEXUALITY QUESTION?

Wednesday, 27 January 2010


All relationships hit bumps from time to time, and THE hallmark of maintaining any relationship means one has to find THE ability to ride out the turbulence and somehow…someway remain intact. We LOVE others through ALL of their transitions, yet more time than not, that sentiment isn’t extended to us. So I’ve learned over the years that one has to find a way to embrace and appreciate the differences that set us apart from each other while NOT actually being apart of each other’s lives on a daily. This way we all can allow each other to be EXACTLY who we are and NO one has to end up feeling hurt OR taken advantage of.

Loving others from afar means NO stress from family, work OR other people that you deal with on a daily. MANY of us are VERY sensitive and put on a STRONG front, NEVER breathing a word about how others make you feel…but how long that last? How long before you break? Sweeping yourself under the rug makes for a bumpy rug that NEVER gets straightened out; and putting others before you while you wear a mask, NO matter how noble the mask, leads one to identify with and think they are the mask! Which will ultimately lead to your breaking point…So you MUST find a way to RISE IN REAL LOVE and know that just might mean that you HAVE to love others from afar…

Short changing yourself to make sure others are okay is NOT what life is supposed to be about! So why spend life continuously dealing with folks that are SET in their ways AND situations that WON’T change? The time to OWN our emotions AND who we are, is NOW! We need to live a life that is as peaceful as we can get it. So moving past the apprehension that we allow to keep us trapped needs is the FIRST step, which would undoubtedly lead to a feeling of liberation and enlightenment. This is because the act of making a clear connection between your circumstances and your feelings unravels the mystery that previously kept you from being in complete control of your emotional state. To give a voice to your feelings necessitates that you let them go. In the process, you naturally relax and rediscover your emotional equilibrium.

Tuesday, 26 January 2010


What you send out - comes back.
What you sow - you reap.
What you give - you get.
What you see in others - exists in you.
Life is an Echo.
It always gets back to you.


If you limit the love you give to just one or two,
It will eventually go stale.
If you learn to create love inside your heart
And silently give it to everyone you meet,
Love will grace every corner of your life.


v     Quit arguing with people about the same old foolishness!
Ø      Respect their position and keep it moving!
v     Quit telling people your secrets when you know they are not going to keep them!
Ø      And if you keep telling them, then quit getting mad when they tell your secrets!
v     Quit trying to pull people on your journey who don't want to travel with you!
Ø      Either they believe in you and value you or they don't!
v     Quit complaining about things you can't and won't change!
Ø      I am not working on being a model...so instead of complaining about the weight charts, negotiated with your doctor for a "comfortable weight for me." Forget the charts! Create your own "healthy weight!"
v     Quit gossiping about other people!
Ø      Minding our own business should be a full time job!
v     Quit blaming each other for things that in the big picture aren't going to matter 3 weeks from now!
Ø      Talk solutions... and then implement them!
v     Quit eating things you know are not good for you!
Ø      If you can't quit...eat smaller portions! (I know it is VERY hard)
v     Quit buying things when we know we can't afford them!
Ø      If you don't have self control, then quit going to the stores!
v     Quit charging things, especially when you don't NEED them!
v     Quit staying in unhealthy relationships!
Ø      It is not okay for people to verbally or physically abuse you! So quit lying to yourself!
Ø      -It is not okay to stay in the marriage for the children or for the sake of saying you are married, it doesn't work! Ask them and they will tell you that they really would prefer to see you happy and that the misery you and your spouse/partner are living with is affecting them!
v     Quit letting people rope you into the drama!
Ø      Start telling them you don't want to hear it!
v     -Quit spreading the drama!
v     Quit calling other relatives and telling them about your cousin or aunt! Go back to #5 - minding your own business should be enough to keep you busy!
v     Quit trying to change people! IT DOESN’T WORK!
v     Quit cussing people out when you know that they are just being the miserable and jealous people that they are!
v     Quit the job you hate!
v     -Start pursuing your passion
Ø      HINT: find the job that fuels your passion before you quit!
v     Quit volunteering for things that you aren't getting any personal fulfillment from anymore!
v     Quit volunteering for things and then failing to follow through with your commitment!
v     Quit listening to the naysayers!
v     Quit watching the depressing news if you are going to live in the doom and gloom of it all!
v     Quit making excuses about why you are where you are or why you can't do what you want to do!
v     Quit waiting on others to give you the answers...and start finding the answers in YOU!
Ø      If what you are doing isn't working for you...then quit it!
v     Quit settling and start making your dreams a reality!
v     Quit being afraid and START LIVING YOUR LIFE!

Monday, 25 January 2010


Have you ever been told by anyone that you MUST be gay because of silly things they feel are gay traits? I've told some crazy things over the years, but my top 3 are:

2. You look like a PRETTY boy (w/e that is).
3. Your name is Kishna and that's a girl's name.


Sunday, 24 January 2010


I know that many think that I have such a weird way of thinking about how this bible, church AND god thing works. But I can’t sit here and tell other humans that GOD wants you to do this or that…how can I? I often wonder how we as humans sit here with our finite thinking and suggest that God is this way or another. I often tell people that God would NOT give you a choice when there isn’t one.

Think about it…We say that God wants us to be happy and safe RIGHT? Okay so in order for us to have that, we have to live a certain way to live with him in heaven. However if we don’t then we will go to hell…Now I don’t know about you, but I don’t know anyone that would out rightly say they want to go to hell…so what type of God gives man a choice when there really isn’t one to begin with? Did this God of man REALLY give us NO WAY OUT?

Saturday, 23 January 2010


"Everything Is Everything" is the fifth single by Lauryn Hill of the Fugees from her debut solo album The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill. It features John Legend, who was little known then, playing on the piano, but not as a featured artist. It reached #35 on the Billboard Hot 100 singles chart, #14 on the Hot R&B/Hip-Hop Singles & Tracks chart and #18 on the Rhythmic Top 40 chart. In the song, Lauryn Hill sings, while halfway through, she starts to rap, then switch back to singing, while repeatedly singing the title "Everything Is Everything". Though not as popular as "Doo Wop (That Thing)", it is considered as one of the greatest rap songs of all time, being voted #66 in About.com's Top 100 Rap Songs.

When I hear this song I reminded that there are SO many facts of life; and MANY of us don’t know to interpret it. We may hover between NOT caring AND taking life onto our shoulders when things in life are far MORE complex than either scenario. Still, not knowing how to take things from day to day is taking its toll on us. We look life over its head and NOT make eye contact with the things that are REALLY going on. Each time we do this, we disconnect ourselves from a large portion of our humanity when all we have to do is know that EVERYTHING IS EVERYTHING!


Friday, 22 January 2010


Ok, here he cums with his 10.5" D!CK telling me he is horny and how wants to F&CK me so badly...He is begging for my ASS, thinks he has what it takes to give me a good time. Here he goes again...Come and take a seat on daddy’s big dick and I am sure you'll want more. He went onto say that, 'it's thick and long, hard as stone' and he is going to take me to heaven...GUESS HE DOESN'T KNOW THAT I KNOW THAT HEAVEN IS OVER-RATED & WHAT HE SELLING I AIN'T BUYING...GUESS HE DOESN'T KNOW THAT I HAVE SEEN HIS TIRED OLD ASS AROUND TOWN & I WOULD HAVE TO BE REALLY, REALLY, REALLY DESPARATE TO GET WITH A PIECE OF SH!T LIKE HIM...The nerve of someone like him to think he can get a DIAMOND like me, how can I just give up on life like that? How can he ask that of me? DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?

So the other night I met this guy in cyber-space and he went on to tell me how wanted a man's touch so badly but he isn't out there @ all, he is DL. So I being the spawn of Satan that I am played up to notion that this man carried in his head. I too told him that I was DL which of course eased his soul and finally he could get what his ass been aching for. Funny thing to me is that I wondered how many men he told that he is DL? How many times can that line be used before one realizes that if one SISSY knows, it ain't that long till others find out. How can a man live in such fear of his sexuality that he lies to family who on some level knows but can't pin-point it. How can he splash up in a woman and know that he isn't on the up & up...DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME? 

I am all for equality and I praise the difference that make up the rainbow of this world. However I realized that I can't get with a guy that is a drag queen. Sadly I know that it's just an impersonation, but the men here take it into their personalities and become Ms. whoever they are portraying @ the time. Can you see me now with my legs up in the air getting busy with a QUEEN just piling D!CK on me, sweating HER ass off with face powder dripping on me? HELLS NO!...DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?
THE M&M's:
Ok now these are the ones that I find interesting, they find some poor girl who wants to believe that the man she is with wants her and her alone. Sadly she is the only woman he wants because he doesn't want any other...She can't slip in between his ASS with 10" D!CK waiting to tap his prostate unless she is using a dildo and most men aren't that open-minded. So they prowl the 'DARK FOREST' in search of prey that will devour them and give the pleasure they know won't come from a woman. They are all on the internet seek that DL man...that queen that still in so strange way make him feel like he isn't GAY anymore. So do you think that when this loser rolls my way seeking a piece of the action he will get it? Do you think that he has what it takes to ask me to help him see just how much he hates himself? Do you think he has what it takes to send a vibration my way? SO DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?
These men are so unbelievable; they hit me online with their slang and think it's cool to speak the way do. I certainly speak the Queen's English and I know that the way he speaks shows that he is ONLY perpetrating what the world say he should be all about. Funny how he thinks he is THE epitome of MAN all the while being told how to talk, dress, walk, eat, sleep…DAMN EVEN HOW TO F&CK! These men are made by the world and so to you I say… DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME? 
Ok here it comes; you meet him right, he comes all shy and innocent. He is all down for sex but doesn’t know if he wants to go there because he isn’t like that…NOW HERE I AM THINKING WTF? SHOULD I SAY IT? YES I SHOULD IT’S MY BLOG…UMMM SWEETS YOU PRETEND AS IF U DON’T HAVE SEX THAT OFTEN BUT YOUR UNTIGHT ASS BEGS TO DIFFER…I say its so funny to see the games he plays, pretending that my D!CK can’t get in and all the MOANING & GROANING…DAMN I AM GETTING HARD (YEAH RIGHT)…B!TCH PLEASE, you are an easy F&CK from the moment you sent out that S. O. S. for someone to ease the tension in your ass and that landed on my doorstep, you know and I know that you are an easy F&CK….I don’t think that I need ask but just in case… DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?
So how many times have you met MR. PROFESSIONAL, MR. BUSINESS MEETING…MR. I ONLY 2 MINS BECAUSE I AM TOO BUSY TO BREATHE? I for one have met one too many of these men and the funny thing is that they are in a place where they’ve made it financially. However they’ve lost their humanity and don’t care about those around him that could use some help from time to time. I know it’s their money and shits but haven’t you been taught that money go, money come? These men are caught in their own physiological bullshit that they are transferring their own thoughts and feeling on others that they themselves would do if in that situation…NOW THE INTERESTING FOR ME HERE IS THAT I’VE BEEN F&CK BY THIS KINDA MAN BEFORE…OK A FEW TIMES BUT I CAN NOW SAY… DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME? 
You’ve met him a thousand times before, he fears losing out on LOVE and when it happens he pretends as if it didn’t happen. He tries to hide the pain in his heart but you can see it in his eyes. He is taking a long sleepwalk through life; ignoring the voice in his head that tells him that he is fighting a losing battle…for he can’t be loved if he doesn’t have love for himself…HE CONSTANTLY WAITS FOR SOMEONE TO LOVE HIMEVEN JUST A LITTLE! His lack of confidence makes him a cynic and his human condition prevents him from being truly at ease. His doors to self-love are bared…locked without any keys. His hope and fear are two sides of a coin much like Abel and Cane. Funny how in the end it adds up to the same…SO TO YOU I ASK… DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?
Did you see him? No? He is the one that calls me everything in the world that suppose to demean my sexuality…INTERESTING ENOUGH, HE IS ONLY DOING THAT BECAUSE HE WANTS TO F&CK ME! Now I on the other see right his SH!T, he tries his hardest to make me look the thing that the world despise; only it is he that despises himself…He is fighting his attraction to my MAN-LY-NESS, he can’t deal with the TRUTH…he WANTS me, he CRAVES me…he wants me F&CK him! So he goes home seek me on the internet, hiding behind his computer…talking DIRRRTY to me telling me about how his GIRL don’t satisfy him, how he L-O-N-G-S for my D!CK in his ASS…How he L-O-N-G-S for just one drop to grant his SALVATION…WITH THAT SAID, DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?
He is the combination of THE UNCONFIDENT MAN mixed with THE SELF ABSORB MAN that tries to make you AN E~Z F&CK. He is worst than the internet whore and pays so much attention to HIMSELF he might as well be a QUEEN…This man lives such a F&CKED UP existence, he is ill-bred, undeveloped…simply an idi-ass BOY of a MAN. But this mother fucker tries to test my MAN-HOOD, trying to step to someone like me…Thinking he on easy street and that he will get his…Better move along with that shit and take that bone to some other dog! He thinks he the man; what a fucking joke! He must really think me mad, how can he expect me to exist? He must think me mad, for how can HE expect me to exist when I must resist? Do you think he knows that the fascists in HIS life would have their way with me if it was in his power? He has a noose for my neck and he is trying to tighten it every hour…Trying to squeeze from me the fire of my illicit desire…NOW PLEASE BE HONEST WITH ME, I WANT THE TRUTH…DO U TH!NK HE CAN ¿F&CK ME?

Thursday, 21 January 2010


When I come across someone that says or does something ignorant when it comes to things they perceive to be true about sexuality, I try my HARDEST not to understand why that person possesses that particular mindset. After all an opinion is just like an asshole…EVERYONE has one! So about 2 weeks ago I decided to start taking water to work with me. Who didn’t ask me about the water bottle I was carrying didn’t ask because they didn’t want to. I was like why all the interest in a simple bottle? So I got to my desk and a lady came in and saw my bottle, she then asked, ‘what’s the bottle for?’ I told her that it was for water, she then said ‘oh.’ @ That point my co-worker asked her what that meant she said, ‘well nothing really, I just thought ONLY women do stuff like that.’ My co-worker was like huh? He then turned to me and asked if I heard her? I said yes, but I going to keep on walking and I am NOT going to look back. If I had told her what was really on my mind I would have told her to…

CHECK YOUR PERSPECTIVE because the narratives you tell yourself about what you think you know is WAAAYYY of base! Why berate yourself with accepted ignorance?
STOP THE COMPARISONS! There is NO one way to live in this world and if she wants me to act like, be like AND shape like a man she recognizes, she is looking @ the WRONG man! There is no comparing me to others, for that’s a tool used by those who lack imagination and have a profound disrespect for humanity.

FACE YOUR FEARS because WAAAYYY too many of you are held hostage by what you think I am. You’ve created all these imaginary monsters that you think are going to destroy the world and take something away from you…rather someone.
LEARN FOR YOURSELF and don’t try to justify your ignorance! Find a way to have a DIFFERENT relationship with your heart N’ mind because we all live on this planet fighting some battle so…
I LOVE YOU because you were NOT born, nor are of evil or wrongdoing. You were born into circumstances and situations, systems and societies with ideas and beliefs that created a reality for the people who brought you here...Anything that happened to you is not a reflection of your worth, only a commentary on how the world is ignorant to OUR beauty and value as human beings.

I find it SO sad that she and others like her have strayed from the basic sense of humanity. We say and do SO many things on a daily that no one seems to have the time to analyze and think things over…SO THE MORE THEY COME @ ME, THE MORE I SUSTAIN MY INNER CALM & STABILITY.

Wednesday, 20 January 2010


Sexuality is life; sexuality and life go hand in hand. Life has wisely managed to create sexuality, eroticism, love and tenderness. As human beings we may live without love, tenderness, eroticism, but to do so is nearly impossible because they are all dimensions for the full experience of human sexuality. While we live key moments and change related to sexuality, love, mating and the erotic life, there is still much to be done to ensure that sexuality is no longer a source of discomfort, pain and frustration and become what it deserves for the great majority of human beings; source of growth and personal fulfillment. 

We understand the eroticism as the capacity that we humans live, experience, share and express sexual pleasure, is the ability to mobilize and activate our sexual arousal and emotions that accompany it in the context of an encounter that aims at the possibility of intimacy with another. We are a body made to feel, rich in sensory organs. We have a great ability sensory and sensual. Learn to feel, learn by practicing, experimenting, turning our senses and sense organs. We are able to feel sensations, enjoying the pleasure of being stimulation.


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