10 TRUTHS I WISH YOU KNEW SOONER

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I occasionally, believe that being better informed leads to better decisions. Mostly, though, I think we make choices based on who we are, not what we know. So if you are willing and is able to accept the words in this entry, you just might tilt (sooner) in the right direction…So read, take in and apply to your life it will only do wonders for you!  

1. Events reveal people’s characters; they don’t determine them. If two people are hit by a bus and crippled for life, one will become a bitter shut-in; the other, could become a warm, outgoing person cheerful despite everything or they both could die. Nonetheless, it is NOT about the bus! It is about taking the chance to be the person you wish to be, until you die.

2. Lying, by omission or commission, is a bad idea. You cannot shake your dependency on the white lie, because you were brought up to be nice. I know there isn’t a nice way to say, “I’d rather stick a fork in my eye than come to your house for dinner.” But the meaningful lie, the kind that involves being untruthful or deceitful about important stuff to those you love, is like poison. Telling the truth hurts, but it doesn’t kill. Lying kills love.

3. Sex always gives you an answer, although not necessarily the one you want. It’s possible to have very good sex, a few times, with a person who shouldn’t be in your life at all. Have fun, and hide your wallet and your BlackBerry. On the other hand, it’s unlikely that a grown man, however nice, will become much, much better in bed than he was the first five times you slept with him. And if you sleep with a man who is unkind to you, there will be more of that; long after the sex is humdrum, the cruelty will be vivid.

4. Most talents are transferable. If you can raise toddlers and teenagers with relative calm, you can be a CEO. If you’re a good driver, you can probably steer a cab, fly a plane, captain a boat. All you need is the teaching gene and you can teach ANYTHING! All you have to do is be one lesson ahead of your students and...

5. Fashion fades; style is eternal. Not only do you not have to wear the latest thing out there, you probably shouldn’t. The point of fashion is to indulge briefly in something fun. The point of style is to have one―whether that’s a pair of jeans or a simple T-shirt, it should last you a lifetime. All you have to do is think you deserve to look and feel your best and spend some time figuring out how to do it.

6. You can’t fake love. Staying in a love relationship when love is not what you feel isn’t likely to end well. If you know that what you crave is security/disposable income and not the person next to you in bed, do the right thing. It’s true that one can learn to love someone over time and often through difficult circumstances. But unless the two of you agree to wait until you’re old and all the storms have passed, in the hope that love will kick in, it’s better to bail sooner rather than later.

7. Mean doesn’t go away. Some people get better looking with age; some don’t. Some people soften; some toughen up. Mean streaks tend not to disappear. A person who demeans and belittles you and speaks of you with contempt to others is probably going to be that way for years. The first time it happens, take note. The second time, take your coat and go.

8. No one’s perfect. I knew that I wasn’t perfect; I just didn’t realize that this also applied to the people I fell in love with. The object of your affection will always turn out to have huge and varied faults. The smart thing is not to look for someone flawless, but to look for someone whose mix of strengths and liabilities appeals to you twice.

9. Ask for help. It’s possible you’ll get turned down. It’s even more likely that you’ll feel vulnerable and exposed. Do it anyway, ESPECIALLY if you are the helpful sort yourself. Those of us who like to offer assistance and hate to take any are depriving other people of the opportunity to be generous and kind; you are also blinding yourself to the reality of mutual dependence. You wouldn’t wear pink hot pants and pretend they were flattering. Don’t pretend you don’t need help.

10. Keep your eye on the prize and your hand on the plow. It’s easy to lose sight of what you want, especially if you haven’t gotten it. I know it’s less work to put the wish away, to pretend that the wish itself has disappeared. But it’s important to know what your prize is, because that is part of who you are. Whether it’s financial stability, a collection of poetry, or a happy relationship, take Winston Churchill’s advice and never give in. Never give in. Never give in.

SOURCE: REAL SIMPLE