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Wednesday, 07 January 2009

SEX FACTS...

GIVING HEAD:  massages the jaw....while burning 32 calories. (SWALLOWING BODY JUICES is actually like taking vitamins and it whitens your teeth, so suck a dick and save a smile).
                  

BURNING CALORIES : 
NICE SEX:  Having nice sex burns 358 calories.                    
ROUGH SEX:  Having rough sex [make it hurt], burns 543 calories.              
TAKING OFF CLOTHING:
With consent – 12 cal
Without consent – 187 cal
                    


TAKING OFF UNDIES:
With two hands – 8 cal
With one hand – 12 cal
With mouth – 85 cal
                      
PUTTING ON PROTECTION:
With a hard-on – 6 cal
With soft dick – 315 cal
                      
FOREPLAY:
Looking for target – 8 cal
Finding the spot – 92 cal
I don't F&CKING care attitude – 0 cal
                       
DIFFERENT STYLES
AND POSITIONS:
Missionary – 358 cal
Doggy – 316 cal
69 lying – 286 cal
69 standing – 512 cal
                    
ORGASM:
Real – 112 cal
Faking – 315 cal
                      
AFTER THE BIG 'O':
Lying in Bed – 18 cal
Hop off the bed – 36 cal
Wondering why you are the only one smiling – 816 cal
                      
GETTING DRESSED:
Quiet and calm – 32 cal
Rushing – 98 cal
Heard spouse opening the door – 1218 cal
Heard parents & little sibling @ the door – 1942 cal

24 comments:

  1. lmao. funny ish. i feel like i need to go have an affair...lol

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  2. This is too funny. I could use some calories. Lemmie get to my baby so we can work (it) out!!

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  3. LOL! I need to burn some calories... :)

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  4. :-)Orgasm faking:315 cal!!!!a lot! Nice picture also!

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  5. Well i always knew that sex was a great form of exercise but was clueless in terms of the breakdown of calories burnt from various sexual activities. I guess what they say is right,you do learn something new everything. Thank you for keeping us informed......

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  6. I wonder who did this research and came up with this very detailed information. That person must have had a lot of fun doing so. I guess now we have no excuse for getting rid of those calories.

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  7. so 115 for a real orgasm,315 for faking .... Are we advocating faked orgasms here.....I think they need 2 check that again... LOL!!!!!!!!

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  8. hmm interesting, time for a good work out then lol

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  9. Damn no wonder Im losing so much weight....shit I need to go back and count how many calories Im losing per day....lol

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  10. o and about my smile....





















    I was always told I have a pretty set of teeth...hmmm

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  11. o and my commentators widget was acting up ...so I removed it


    will try again...dont worry

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  12. Ossie dont tell me that you are thinking of faking....



    dont even try that one, its gotta be hard to do that with such a great guy....lmao

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  13. Damn, I be losing MAD weight then.....:)

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  14. lol at the faking an orgasm/ wonderingw hy youre the only ne smiling!


    hahaha!


    damn i need to find a sex buddy!

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  15. Awesome, hilarious and true.

    And bottomline, STRESSFUL things burn more calories. ;-)

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  16. Did you conduct the research yourself? This gave me something to ponder.

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  17. LMAO!!!!!!!!! I like this blog entry lol lol.

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  18. LMAO...this is real? Yay! Now I can put myself on a sex regiment...or at least now I know I'm losing weight by having sex whew..so much for the gym LMFAO!!sike!!!

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  19. This is hilarious - well the getting dressed part

    Cool beans dude

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