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Friday, 06 February 2009

SOME COOL MEANINGS...


  1. Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.
  2. Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
  3. Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
  4. Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine waterpower.
  5. Dictionary: A place where divorce comes before marriage.
  6. Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.
  7. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.
  8. Classic: A book which people praise, but does not read.
  9. Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
  10. Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
  11. Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
  12. Etc: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
  13. Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
  14. Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
  15. Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.
  16. Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
  17. Diplomat: A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
  18. Opportunist: A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.
  19. Optimist: A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway See I am not injured yet.
  20. Pessimist: A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY.
  21. Miser: A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
  22. Father: A banker provided by nature.
  23. Criminal: A guy no different from the rest. Except that he got caught.
  24. Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
  25. Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.
  26. Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.
  27. Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.
  28. Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master
  29. Divorce: Future tense of marriage
  30. Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

12 comments:

  1. You laugh when you read them because they sound so funny, but most of the meanings are actually true, hey?

    My favourite personal favourites would have to be:
    1. Conference Room
    2. Ecstacy
    3. Classic
    4. Etc
    5. Committee
    6. Philosopher
    7. Diplomat
    8. Boss

    ReplyDelete
  2. Webster what the fuck out.....

    ReplyDelete
  3. SHALLOTTE - I AM LIKING YOUR FAVS...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Boss hits it right on the mark!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I cosign lecture, I dont remember jack from the lectures I took.

    ReplyDelete
  6. ooopppsss, I meant "WATCH" the fuck out...hahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  7. I really...enjoyed this post! I have an affair with words! Great post!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Very funny and cynical but there is a lot of truth to them.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Ecstasy: A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before. [My favorite]

    Smile, Diplomat, Opportunist, Optimist, Cigarette [others I really like]

    Really good satire - lovely post

    ReplyDelete

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